In the vast landscape of humor, where laughter serves as a universal bridge, we present a carefully curated selection of the finest cheating jokes.
As the renowned humorist Mark Twain wisely stated, “The human race has only one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.”
Through an array of categories, from clean to dirty, one-liners to knock-knock jokes about cheating, we aim to deliver not just laughs.
We will also deliver a therapeutic experience that resonates with the complexities of life, all presented with the trustworthiness of authoritative sources and a touch of professional wit.
Let’s dig in.
Best Cheating Jokes
Embark on a laughter-filled journey with our handpicked selection of the absolute best cheating jokes. From timeless classics to modern gems, we guarantee a rib-tickling experience that transcends humor boundaries.
Hillary Clinton doesn’t s**…
That’s why Bill cheated on her.
Did you hear about the fortune teller that cheated at cards?
I guess that’s how the tarotists win.
I cheated on my 24 year old girlfriend
I apologized and told her my mistress is half the woman she is.
“That’s because she’s 12!”, said my girlfriend.
Did you hear about the president that cheated on his wife with a piece of fruit?
He was impeached.
Woman in a bar says to her friend “My boyfriend cheated on me and i don’t need a man like that”
Friend : Aww honey what happened
Woman : He said he prefers his wife sometimes.
My boyfriend cheated on me.
So I convinced him to get matching tattoos… he went first and I went home.
Two men take a test to see if they can apply to the same job.
Afterwards, the boss walks to the second person.
“We know you cheated off of [the first person]”
“How so?”
“On number 6, he said ‘I don’t know,’ and you said ‘I don’t know either.'”
Did you hear the one about the panda who cheated people of their money?
I heard he bamboozled them.
My wife cheated on me with a Mexican.
She’s with Jesus now.
A lot of people keep saying to me Trump cheated the election.
Well, honestly we shouldn’t be Russian to collusion’s.
A couple have a lot of s**…
They challenge each other to see who can have the most s**… in a month. The woman wins.
Some say she cheated.
I used to date a Russian who cheated on me and took all my money.
Her name was Svetlana Fuckhimova.
I suspected my wife cheated on me at a Bill Cosby’s house party last night…
“No, I didn’t have s**… with Bill Cosby”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure I’d remember having s**… with Bill Cosby!”
My girlfriend cheated on me with a well-endowed guy.
I forgave her and took her back because I wanted to be the bigger man.
My girlfriend cheated on me with my best friend.
And when I do the same, I am called a gay.
Why did the cheater bring a ladder to the exam?
Because they heard the test was “open book”!
Funny Cheating Jokes
Prepare for an uproarious experience with our collection of funny cheating jokes. Crafted to perfection, these jokes promise to evoke genuine laughter and brighten your day. Join us on a comedic escapade where humor takes center stage, showcasing the lighter side of life’s twists and turns.
So I went to Iraq for holidays…
And I found out that my girlfriend cheated on me back home…
Knowing that I can’t trust anyone I wanted to kill myself.
So I called the s**… hotline…
They got excited and asked me if I can drive a plane.
Sean Connery told me he got a tattoo of armour on his mouth, and that I mustn’t tell anyone.
“OK,” I replied, “And I recently cheated on my wife. So you must keep my secret, if you want me to keep yours.”
He said, “My lips are shield.”
Why did the cheater break up with the calculator?
Because it couldn’t handle all the division!
I just got to know that my wife cheated on me with all the jury members of my trial.
Can’t blame her though, it was a hung jury.
I know a guy with a f**… who just cheated on his wife.
He got off on the wrong foot.
What’s a cheater’s favorite song?
“I Will Always Cheat on You” by Shady Love!
If I had a dollar for every person my ex cheated on me with.
I’d have 60 cents.
TIFU by telling my dad his girlfriend cheated on him.
In all fairness, I could’ve sent the wedding invitations through the mail instead…
Why did the cheater bring a ladder to the exam?
To climb to the top of the class!
How does a cheater apologize?
“I’m sorry, I mistook you for someone I could cheat on.”
My ex- girlfriend is an accountant and she cheated on me with her boss to get a raise. She regretted her decision and texted me begging me to take her back.
I responded: “oh look, it’s the thot that counts.”
Why did the cheater become a weather forecaster?
Because they were always good at predicting the conditions of their relationships!
I was cheated on by a tennis player…
Should’ve seen it coming. Love means nothing to them.
What’s a cheater’s favorite sport?
Hopscotch – they’re always jumping from one relationship square to the next!
How does a cheater like their coffee?
With a little extra cream on the side!
Why don’t cheaters ever get caught?
Because they’re always one step ahead of the truth!
What’s a cheater’s favorite board game?
Monopoly – they’re always looking to cheat their way to victory!
Why did the cheater join the choir?
To learn how to harmonize their lies!
How does a cheater spell relief?
C-H-E-A-T-I-N-G!
Why did the cheater get a job at the bakery?
Because they’re good at rolling out lies!
Why did the cheater become a juggler?
Because they’re experts at juggling multiple relationships!
What’s a cheater’s favorite dance move?
The two-step – one step with their partner, one step with someone else!
Hilarious Cheating Jokes
Indulge in laughter therapy with our compilation of hilarious cheating jokes. Delve into the world of wit and mischief as we present a carefully curated assortment designed to leave you in stitches. Brace yourself for a rollercoaster of hilarity that guarantees a memorable and uproarious experience.
If nuns cheated at video games…
…they’d prefer using god mode.
My girlfriend asked me if I’d ever cheated.
I admitted that I had, and begged her not to tell my wife.
“Father, I have a confession to make. Yesterday I cheated on my wife with two 18 year old girls.”
“Alright. When you get home, squeeze out 18 lemons and drink it all at once.”
“And that will free me from my sin?”
“No, but it’ll free your face from that dirty smile.”
My girlfriend always tells me that the one thing she won’t tolerate is infidelity…
She would leave, no questions ask, if I ever cheated on her. Thankfully, my wife is a little more lenient.
I cheated on my wife tonight. The guilt is really getting to me… maybe I should confess?
How do I tell her that when she was on the toilet, I took $5000 from the bank and put two houses on Mayfair.
A guy asks his mexican girlfriend if she ever cheated on him, she responds:
No, you’re my only juan.
If I had a nickel for every time my ex wife cheated on me.
She would have taken that too.
An award is given to families who have 10 children.
A man and his wife have 9 children, the husband tells his wife that he cheated on her and that he has another child, he’ll go get him and then they can enjoy the money together.
When the man is back home with the child he sees no one in the house.
He asks his wife where are the kids?
She replied each father came and took his child
You may have cheated off my test, but the joke is on you.
Because you cheated off of my test.
Since everyone knows he cheated, Lance Armstrong will only drink at home now.
He just can’t handlebars anymore.
A man ask his wife to tell him how many time she cheated on him when he dies.
The wife accepts.
3 weeks later, the man fakes his death to see his wife reaction.
Wife: Babe, like I promised I’m going to tell you the truth. I only cheated on you twice. Once to get you that job at the bank and the second time to get you that promotion to director.
The man stands up immediately after hearing this.
Man: Honey, can you make me CEO?
Me: I have cheated once
Wife: me too
Me: first april…
Wife: 8th October.
I will never date a woman that hasn’t been cheated on before.
I’m not about to be the first person to do that to her.
My husband cheated.
I caught my husband cheating. I’m not going to lie, I didn’t handle it in the most mature way possible.
I threw an iron at him and took quite a bit of money from him.
Then later we had a heart to heart and decided never to play Monopoly again. Lesson learned.
How did Rihanna know Chris Brown had cheated on her?
She saw another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
Short Cheating Jokes
Experience the essence of humor distilled into bite-sized amusement with our collection of short cheating jokes. Perfect for those seeking quick laughs, these concise gems deliver a punch of wit that will leave you chuckling. Join us on a journey where brevity meets hilarity.
Why did the cheater open a zoo?
To keep all their options open!
What’s a cheater’s favorite movie genre?
Action – they love playing the field!
How does a cheater stay organized?
With a little black book and a lot of lies!
Why did the cheater get a job as a gardener?
Because they’re experts at planting seeds of doubt!
What’s a cheater’s favorite type of puzzle?
The one where they have to piece together their alibis!
Why did the cheater become a magician?
To master the art of deception!
How does a cheater measure success?
By the number of hearts they’ve broken!
What’s a cheater’s favorite emoji?
The winking face – they’re always up to something!
Why did the cheater become a lifeguard?
Because they’re experts at swimming in shallow waters!
My wife found out i was cheating on her after she found all the letters I was hiding…
She got so mad and said she’s never gonna play scrabble with me ever again.
My ex-wife cheated on me with her deaf best friend!
Honestly, I should have seen the signs.
I’ve been cheating on my girlfriend with her twin, but it’s OK because I can tell them apart. Brian has a moustache.
Do you know how Chris Brown’s girlfriend found out that he had been cheating on her?
She found another girl’s lipstick on his fist.
How did Chris Browns girlfriend find out he was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
1 in every 3 people cheats in their relationships.
I’m left wondering… Is it my wife or my girlfriend that’s cheating?
Statistics say that 1/3 of people cheat in their relationships.
Which got me thinking,
Is it my wife or is it my girlfriend who is cheating?
I think my wife’s cheating on me with my best friend.
He’s been miserable lately. Poor guy.
My girlfriend thinks I’m cheating on her, and I’m getting tired of it.
She sounds just like my wife.
Why did the rabbit suspect his wife was cheating on him?
He kept finding different hares in his bed.
After my wife found my letters I had to come clean and tell her I was cheating. She said she will never play scrabble with me again.
Cheating Jokes One Liners
Savor the simplicity of humor with our collection of cheating jokes one-liners. Each line is a masterpiece of wit, carefully crafted to deliver maximum amusement in a single stroke. Brace yourself for a cascade of laughter with these succinct and clever jokes.
What did the cheater say to their partner when caught?
“I can explain… but it’s gonna take a lot of lies!”
Why did the cheater become a locksmith?
Because they’re always trying to unlock someone else’s heart!
How does a cheater study for exams?
By copying off someone else’s paper… and their partner’s notes!
What’s a cheater’s favorite holiday?
April Fools’ Day – the perfect excuse for playing tricks on their partners!
Why did the cheater become a chef?
Because they’re experts at cooking up lies and deceit!
My girlfriend accused me of cheating I told her she was starting to sound like my wife.
A lion would never cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood.
What did the Bulbasaur say when he found out his wife was cheating on him? Bulbasaur.
I could never cheat in a relationship.
That would require 2 people to find me attractive.
She: “I cheated on you”
He: “Me too”
She: “April, 1”
He: “March, 20”
My deaf girlfriend cheated on me with her best friend I should’ve seen the signs.
Bill Gates to Melinda: “I’ll never cheat on you again.” “I give you my Word.”
I messaged my ex on the day before my exam.
I asked if she had any good cheating tips.
What do you call a knight who cheats on tests?
Glancelot.
I saw my sister on Tinder. Can’t believe she’s cheating on me.
I cheated on a girl that was a bartender.
I hope she gives me another shot.
I saw my ex while taking a test today wonder if she cheated on that too…
Clean Cheating Jokes
Explore the lighter side of mischief with our collection of clean cheating jokes. Crafted for wholesome amusement, these jokes promise laughter without compromising on decency. Join us in embracing the joy of laughter with humor that’s as pure as it is funny.
Dr seuss cheated on his wife and she ended up killing herself.
One wife, two wife, dead wife, new wife.
An old man is on his deathbed…
And his wife is sitting next to him in a chair, holding his hand. He seems to be fading fast, and with a great effort he grasps her hand. “My love, I must confess something.. I’ve cheated on you with dozens…maybe thousands of women…”
She looks at him tearfully, wipes the tears from her eyes and says “shhh now my love..i know..now hush and let the poison work”
A mid 30’s guy is grocery shopping, and a 20 something blonde catches his eye.
She looks very familiar, but he can’t remember where he met her. When they moved closer, she said to him, “Hi – I think you’re the father of one of my children.”
The guy freaks out. He says, “I’ve only cheated on my wife 3 times – in Vegas 5 years ago, in Orlando 4 years ago, and in Seattle 3 years ago. You look familiar, but I just can’t remember. Who are you?”
She says, “I’m your son’s Sunday school teacher.”
Bedside Wife
A man was sleeping on his deathbed he woke up to see his wife silently praying beside him.
He says “Martha, I have something to confess to you.”
She says “No dear, save your energy.”
He says ” I must tell you so I may pass on to heaven, I cheated on you.”
She says ” I know, I poisoned you.”
A pregnant woman and a blonde woman…
Are talking, and the pregnant woman says that she is pregnant with twins. So the blonde woman asks, “Oh my gosh! You cheated on your husband?? Who’s the second father?”
A Man Is Almost About To Die
As he lay on his deathbed, the man confided to his wife, “I cannot die without telling you the truth. I cheated on you throughout our whole marriage. All those nights when I told you I was working late, I was with other women. And not just one woman either, but I’ve slept with dozens of them.”
His wife looked at him calmly and said, “Why do you think I gave you the poison?”
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead had a swimming race
They had to do the breast s**…. The brunette finished first, followed closely by the redhead. They had to go save the blonde because she seemed to be drowning.
When the blonde was able to speak she yelled, “you cheated! You guys used your arms!”
A farmer finds a shoebox under his wife’s side of the bed
The box contained two ears of corn and $4000. He went to his wife
Farmer: What’s this?
Wife: I have a confession to make. Whenever I cheated on you I put an ear of corn in the box.
The farmer gasps, then thinks “50 years of marriage…only twice..that’s not too awful.
Farmer: What about the $4000?
Wife: Whenever I got a bushel I sold it.
Did you know that Stalin had a girlfriend that cheated on him?
You know what, don’t worry about it. She’s out of the picture now anyway.
This morning, I was diagnosed with depression in the head.
Me: I cheated on my girlfriend and she found out last night. We broke up.
Doctor: Is this the cause of your depression?
Me: No, I think the chair she threw at me did it.
What did Courtney Love say to Kurt Kobain after finding out he cheated on her?
*”I’ll give you one more shot”*
My girlfriend told me that if I ever cheated on her, it would be worse if it was with a black girl. I told her she was wrong.
It’d only be three-fifths as bad.
A husband was on his deathbed with his wife by his side.
“Honey, I have something to confess to you.”, he says.
“No dear, save your energy.”
“I must tell you so I may pass on to heaven.” He says. “I cheated on you.”
“I know.” She said. “I poisoned you.”
A Dutch and a Belgian are sitting in a bar, watching the evening news.
They see a woman ready to jump from the 6th floor, shouting “I’m going to jump, I’m going to jump!”.
The dutch says: “I bet she’s gonna jump.”
The Belgian replies: “And I bet she won’t.” So they bet, and the woman jumps. Then the Dutch tells the Belgian: “I have to confess that I cheated, as I already saw it on the 1pm news.” – “Me too”, says the Belgian, “I saw it on the 1pm news already. But I did not think that she would be s**… enough to jump twice.”
I cheated in the annual rabbit racing contest…..
I won by a hare.
Dirty Cheating Jokes
Dive into the risqué realm of humor with our collection of dirty cheating jokes. For those who appreciate humor with a hint of spice, these jokes push the boundaries in pursuit of genuine laughter. Brace yourself for an adult-oriented comedic adventure.
A woman was in bed having sex with her husband’s friend, when all of a sudden the telephone rings, she answers. After hanging up she says, ”That was Harry, but don’t worry, he won’t be home for a while. He’s playing cards with you.”
My wife has been cheating on me and in hindsight I should have seen it coming
For the past couple months we’d barely talked at all. Our jobs had been super stressful and it made things tense. When she’d ask how my day was, I’d tersely reply “it sucked” or “you don’t want to know.”
When I asked her how her day had been she’d say “They fucked me at work again”
Wife caught me cheating.
My wife ran out the room last night, she turned and screamed at me, ‘And you know what?
You’ve gone too far this time…..we’re finished!! You’re bankrupt and the way you wander round the streets so aimlessly, it’s a suprise you don’t one day end up in prison!”
But babe…’ I said, taking a step forward. ‘No, just go away oh, and don’t even bother saying you love me because I saw you fucking cheating!
‘You fucking cheat!’ she screamed, a tear in her eye as she slammed the door.
She’ll be back, I thought. She always gets over emotional when we play Monopoly.
I could tell my wife was cheating on me when she said she was out with her friend.
Her friend has been in bed with me for the past hour. That lying, cheating bitch.
Cheating Golfer
A married man was having an affair with his secretary.
One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they made passionate love all afternoon.
Exhausted from the wild sex, they fell asleep, awakening around 8pm.
As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt.
Mystified, she nonetheless complied.
He slipped into his shoes and drove home. “Where have you been?” demanded his wife when he entered the house.” Darling, I can’t lie to you. I’ve been having an affair with my secretary and we’ve been having sex all afternoon.
I fell asleep and didn’t wake up until eight o’clock. “The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, “You lying bastard! You’ve been playing golf!”
Split up with my lying, cheating, thieving girlfriend last month and it’s been nothing but Happy Days since.
The bitch took all my other box-sets.
“I left your cheating ass because you’re not half the man he is” she said
“Funny, I cheated because she was about half the woman you are” he said.
I walked in on my wife cheating on me
She said it hurt her more then it hurt me. I told her she couldn’t possibly know the pain I was in. She replied, “You didn’t see how big his dick was.”
My dick is so long if I laid it on the keyboard it would stretch all the way from A to Z
Wait… Shit…
My wife suspected I was cheating, so to catch me she hired a prostitute to flash her breasts and try to seduce me.
I didn’t fall for that shit… I can spot a booby trap a mile away.
Cheating Jokes for Adults
For a dose of mature humor, our collection of cheating jokes for adults delivers laughs tailored for a more seasoned audience. Navigate through wit and mischief that reflects the humor that comes with life’s complexities. Join us in a journey where laughter knows no boundaries.
My girlfriend keeps insisting that I’m cheating on her.
She’s starting to sound like my wife.
I just found out my older wife was cheating on me Turns out she’s not a cougar, she’s a cheetah
Who is cheating?
A recent study showed that 1 out of 3 people in a relationship are cheating.
Now I’ve just got to figure out if it’s my girlfriend or my wife.
Statistics show that 1 out of 3 people in a relationship are cheating…..
I just need to figure out if it’s my wife or girlfriend.
I read somewhere that 1 out of 3 people cheat I did the math, and there is a 5/9 chance that either my wife or my girlfriend is cheating on me.
Lying in bed, my girlfriend turned to me and said “You’re a lot like a math exam.”
I replied “Why? Because I’m long and hard?”
She said, “No, I’m cheating on you with an Asian.”
I told my girlfriend I think she’s cheating on me.
She told me I sound just like her husband.
When I was a kid my younger cousin always cheated at freeze tag, So I wasn’t surprised when I heard he got shot by the cops.
What do the 2016 Rio Olympics and the 2016 US presidential race have in common?
Half of the competitors cheat and the other half aren’t qualified.
My best friend got cheated on by his deaf girlfriend…
His girlfriend cheated on him with a deaf guy…
To be fair, he should’ve seen the signs.
My wife found out I was cheating after she found the letters I was hiding.
She got mad and said she’s never playing Scrabble with me again
I’ve always suspected my wife was cheating.
Yesterday I found the evidence I was looking for… She kept the monopoly money hidden in the cushion of the couch.
What’s worse than your wife cheating on you with your brother?
Your wife cheating on you with her brother.
Source: am from Alabama.
They told him: your girlfriend is cheating on you..
He wiped away his tears & asked : Which one ?
I heard the latest statistic that 1 in 3 people cheat on their significant others that means either my wife or my girlfriend is cheating on me.
Hmm….
Cheating Jokes and Puns
Embark on a pun-tastic journey with our collection of cheating jokes and puns. Blending wordplay with humor, these jokes promise a delightful experience that appeals to the linguistically inclined. Join us in exploring the playful side of language through clever wit and mischief.
My girlfriend cheated on me while on her period.
The guy just fingered her, I caught him red-handed.
When you’re a german man and someone asks if you have cheated on your wife and if so how many women with.
Nein.
My girlfriend found out I cheated on her after she found all those letters…
She got mad and said we’re never playing Scrabble again.
Stevie Wonder cheated on his wife.
So she rearranged all the furniture at the house.
If I cheated on my wife as much as she thought I did…
I would be more happily married.
A man wrote the IRS saying . . .
. . . “I have been unable to sleep knowing that I have cheated on my income tax. I have understated my income and have enclosed a check for $1500. If I still can’t sleep I will send the rest”.
College life for introverts
1st year – People are so good to me. I feel I am respected a lot! Friends are bliss!
2nd year – People are distancing from me. I guess they don’t like me. I’ve to find new people I suppose.
3rd year – Should I change my attitude to get friends? I don’t know why I get cheated everytime I trust someone.
4th year – Who needs friends? People are useless. Solitude is the best.
I always cheated on my psychology tests…
I don’t know what that says about me.
Apparently 30% of males go on a diet before going on holiday. I cheated.
And just took a fat girlfriend to the beach.
[Oh, yeah?] My ex-wife cheated on me with a communist!
…there were so many red flags.
Why did the transgender couple break up?
One cheated on the other while they were abroad.
On March 27th, our math teacher burst into class and threatened to cancel Spring Break unless the one who’s cheated on all their tests reveals themselves before next month.
How are we supposed to catch a cheater in eight days?!
America cheated going to the moon
Did you know Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin cheated going to the moon?
They took a buzz cut.
Recently my gf cheated on me with a space alien
She said the s**… was out of this world
Girlfriend to boyfriend
GF – I’m sorry babe but i’ve cheated on you.
BF – I’m sorry aswell, I have also cheated on you.
GF – April fools day!
BF – Mine was on 24th March.
Final Thoughts
As our laughter-filled journey draws to a close, we extend an invitation to share your favorite cheating jokes and humorous tales in the comments below.
Laughter, a timeless elixir, binds us together in joy, and through this collection of jokes about cheaters, we’ve aimed to harness its universal power.
In the words of Victor Borge, “Laughter is the closest distance between two people.”
So, let the camaraderie of comedy continue beyond these virtual pages.
Thank you for joining us on this comedic adventure, and may your days be adorned with the joyous echoes of genuine laughter.
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