Delve into the rhythmic world of humor as drummers take center stage in the realm of drummer jokes and jests.
Renowned psychologists at Harvard affirm that laughter is pivotal for social bonding, making these jokes an essential part of our communal harmony.
Here, we curate an anthology of jokes about drummer, ranging from clean one-liners to risqué humor.
These jokes span all audiences, ensuring a beat of laughter for both kids and adults alike.
Join in the symphony of mirth and share these jokes with your drummer friends for a harmonious resonance of amusement.
Best Drummer Jokes
Step into a world of rhythm-infused humor with our top drummer jokes. From snare-side quips to bass-drum punchlines, these anecdotes are sure to orchestrate waves of laughter.
Ever seen Buddy Rich playing drums?
When it comes to beating around the bush, he’s the drumstick master!
Did you hear about the kid that told his mom that he wanted to grow up a be a drummer?
His mom said that he can’t do both.
Why is the little drummer boy good at math?
He knows how to count.
What is the main commonality between a bird and a drummer?
They both can be caught by laying a snare.
Two drums and a cymbal fall off a roof…
Da dum TSHH!
Did you hear about the drummer who had impeccable timing and half a brain?
Me neither.
How is a drum solo like an earthquake?
It will shake you to your core.
What did the famous drummer name his twin daughters?
Anna ONE, Anna TWO!
What is the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
A drum machine only gets one set of instructions.
Do you know what happened to the drummer boy that couldn’t stop practicing?
He had to deal with severe repercussions.
Why do people call a drummer a formidable opponent?
Because no other can beat them.
What would happen if a drummer had an accident with a car full of instruments?
Percussion.
Why are many drummers worried about getting their drums stolen?
Because they took percussion.
We kicked the drummer out if the band because his timing was awful.
He was so upset he went to the station and threw himself behind a train.
How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
10.
1 to change the bulb and 9 to tell you how much better they could’ve done it.
Why can’t George W Bush get hired as a drummer?
Because most songs are in 4/4 but Bush only does 9/11.
Did you hear about the drummer who got a cymbal stuck in his rear?
Doc says it was a freak injury. I mean, what are the odds?
Must be a Zildjian in one!
How do you know when a bass player and drummer are at your front door?
The knocking is out of time and they don’t know when to come in.
Why is a broken drum the best present you can give someone?
Because you just can’t beat it.
I’m thinking of picking up a new drum set. Any advice?
Don’t worry about it. They aren’t as heavy as they look.
The longest drum solo was 10 hours and 25 minutes, and it was performed by a child sitting behind me on a flight from Los Angeles to Tokyo.
Funny Drummer Jokes
Unleash laughter’s symphony with uproarious drummer jokes. Each punchline is a drumroll of amusement, promising comedic harmony that strikes chords with every reader.
What do you call that annoying person that always hangs around with musicians?
The drummer.
Do you know why I can tell so many drummer jokes?
There are a Zildjian of them to pick from.
How many drummers does it take to move houses?
Just one. He’s used to having no one offer to help him move gear.
Why do drummers struggle to play pool?
None of them can agree on how to hold the pool cue.
What do you do when a drummer comes knocking at your door?
Pay him for the food that he just delivered. Don’t forget to tip, as he really needs the money after getting paid with “exposure” at his nightly gigs.”
How do you get a drummer to stop playing?
Get them to try reading sheet music.
What’s the biggest difference between a drum machine and a human drummer?
When you pour beer on a drum machine, the beats stop being played. When you pour a beer on a human drummer, they suddenly play a lot louder.
An audience member walks up to the drummer after a gig and asks him whether he found their last track to be very threatening.
When the drummer asks why he was questioning that, the audience member explains how the drummer killed it.
Did you know that drummers actually have one of the simplest jobs on earth?
They just repeatedly beat things with sticks.
What songs does a band play for the drummer to keep in time?
That’s an unanswerable question.
How do you know when the drummer has arrived for the practice session?
Everything falls apart, all the songs are counted in wrong, and the girlfriend that he brought with is suddenly more important than anything band related.
Did you hear about the drummer listening and playing along to Led Zeppelin tunes?
He dropped one of his sticks in a place where he couldn’t find it again, so he had to switch to playing Def Leppard tunes.
Do you know why there are so many funny drummer jokes being passed around?
Drummers are the only band members without temper issues, and they know that singers would make a huge scene about it if they were in the spotlight.
Speaking of girlfriends, what do you call a drummer who just broke up with his long-time flame?
Homeless.
A band is playing a packed gig at a bar, but the singer and band leader forgets what the lyrics are of the song they’re currently playing.
He walks to the guitarist to ask if he remembers what they are, and the guitarist shakes his head, as he doesn’t know either. He then walks to the bassist just to get the same response.
When he walks over to the drummer, the drummer replies, “sorry, but what song are we playing?”
What’s the difference between a public toilet and a drummer?
Public toilets only have to deal with one bum at a time.
Hilarious Drummer Jokes
Embark on a laugh-filled journey with uproarious drummer jokes. Each punchline is a drumroll of amusement, promising comedic harmony that strikes chords with every reader.
What would you call a drummer who loves boxing?
A beat-boxer.
How can you tell if a stage is level?
The drummer is drooling from both sides of his mouth.
What is the main commonality between a wrestler and a drummer?
They both break records by beating.
How many drummers does it take to solve a math problem?
A one… a two… a one, two, three four!
Did you hear about the drummer who locked his keys in his car?
It took an hour to get the bass player out.
How do you recognize a drummer at your door?
The knocking speeds up.
Who does a drummer listen to while stargazing?
Ringo Starr.
Who is the favorite drummer of an astronaut?
Keith Moon.
Why can a drummer never be late?
Because he always beats the clock.
What would a drummer’s favorite chapter of Algebra be?
Log-rhythms.
At a concert, someone asked, “How late does the band play?”
Someone replied, “Just about half a beat behind the drummer.”
What band has drummers who love growing and grooming their nails?
Nine Inch Nails.
What’s the biggest lie told to a drummer?
“Hang on and I’ll help you with your gear.”
Did you hear about the drummer who beat around the bush?
Yes, he’s in treble.
What would happen if a drummer lost one of his drumsticks?
He would skip a heartbeat.
What is a drummer’s favorite food for dinner?
Drumsticks.
Why is it so difficult to defeat a drummer in billiards?
Because they are hard to beat.
How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Five, one to screw and the others to watch and say, “Yeah, we too can do it.”
In what band could the drummer never say no to any offers?
‘Yes.’
Who is the wealthiest drummer of all time?
Buddy Rich.
What would you call a drummer who lost his arms and legs in an accident?
A headbanger.
What’s the last thing a drummer says in a KFC establishment?
“Would you prefer to have drumsticks with one of my songs?”
Which band’s drummer would not need to go to the hospital if he was injured?
The Cure.
Which band would have drummers who had drumming coming from within?
Talking Heads.
An Indian chief and a cavalry captain climb to the top of a tall hill and look out upon the entire Indian tribe.
The captain says worriedly, “I don’t like the sound of those drums.” The chief says, “I know. It’s not our regular drummer.”
Drummer Jokes One Liners
Savor the punchy wit of one-liner jokes tailored for drummers. Quick, clever, and full of rhythm, these quips deliver instant laughter in a single beat. Let’s dive right into them.
What do you do if you accidentally run over a drummer?
Back up.
Why aren’t many drummers worried about getting their drums stolen?
Because they took percussions.
How would a drummer address his daughters?
Anna one, Anna Two.
What would you call a drummer who keeps procrastinating?
An expert in beating around the bush.
How would a drum sound when a half-dead fish is dropped on it?
It would be a dramatic drum roll.
What’s a fish’s favorite musical genre?
Future Bass.
I’ve got a drummer joke…
But it’s hard to beat.
Why is a fantastic drum solo like a sneeze?
They both make your heart skip a beat.
Bad Drummer Jokes
Embrace the charm of delightfully bad drummer jokes. Despite their humorous shortcomings, these jokes promise a drumbeat of laughter that’s so bad, it’s good.
What do you call a dozen drummers at the bottom of the sea?
A good start!
How can you tell when a drummer’s at the door?
He doesn’t know when to come in.
What do you call the beautiful woman on the arm of a drummer?
Tattoo.
What do Ginger Baker and black coffee have in common?
They both suck without Cream
I’m addicted to being a lousy drummer.
I wanted to quit, but I just couldn’t beat it.
Why are drummers always losing their watches?
Everyone knows they have trouble keeping time.
Why are drummers impulsive?
They never consider the repercussions.
What is a drummer’s favorite time of day?
12:34!
How can you tell a drummer is walking behind you?
You can hear his knuckles dragging on the ground.
A drummer got a tattoo of their drum kit on their arm.
It was very cymbalic.
Why do bands have bass players?
To translate for the drummer.
What do you call a Drummer in a Volkswagen?
Farfromthinken
What did the drummer say to the band leader?
“Do you want me to play too fast or too slow?”
How do you get a drummer off of your porch?
Pay him 10 bucks for the pizza.
How is a drum solo like a sneeze?
You know it’s coming, but there’s nothing you can do about it.
What does the average drummer get on an IQ test?
Drool.
Hey buddy, how late does the band play?”
“Oh, about half a beat behind the drummer.”
What’s the best way to confuse a drummer?
Put a sheet of music in front of him
I once asked a drummer how to spell “Mississippi”.
He said, “the river or the state?”
How do you get a drummer to play quieter?
Put a chart in front of him.
Did you hear about the drummer who finally became fed up with all the rude jokes about him? He decided to learn a new instrument, so he went to a music store to buy a guitar.
He asked the salesman to give him the most affordable Fender available that still had a great tone. The salesman responded to him very confused, saying that they only sold cars there and that the music store was next door.
A young man once traveled to a remote island for a camping trip. The whole time he was there, he constantly heard the pounding of drums. He made it his mission to find out where they were coming from and why they wouldn’t stop.
He eventually found a group of native tribesmen playing drums in a circle. When he asked them why they hadn’t stopped playing in days, they explained how a bass solo always comes after a drum solo, and they couldn’t bear the thought of it.
A drummer man struggled with his bowel movements, so he went to a doctor for help. He was prescribed laxatives, but they didn’t work, so he went again.
The doctor was confused, so he asked the man what he did for a living. When he said he was a drummer, the doctor expressed how that explained everything. He said, “hey buddy, here’s $20 to buy something to eat.”
Dirty Drummer Jokes
Explore the cheekier side of drummer humor with risqué jokes that riff on the boundaries of hilarity within musical circles. Let us get to these playful and dirty jokes without much further ado.
Why do drummers have lots of kids?
They’re not too good at the Rhythm Method.
What do you call a kid with a set of drums?
The poster child for Birth Control.
Musicians are perverts. The drummer sits in the back beating it, the guitarist is constantly fingering minors, and the bassist is slapping it around.
What type of cap does a stoned drummer wear?
A high hat.
Drummer Jokes for Adults
Indulge in drummer-themed humor for mature audiences, weaving wit and amusement into grown-up jests tailored for a rhythmic chuckle. These jokes are the best fit for the mature sensibilities.
What chairs do drummers use to drum in?
A rocking chair.
How do drummers brush their teeth?
With tooth Paiste.
What’s the difference between a drummer and a toilet seat?
A toilet seat only has to put up with one bum at a time!
Why are drummer jokes so simple?
So the rest of the band can understand them.
What’s the difference between an electric guitar and an onion?
No one cries when you cut up an electric guitar.
“Hey buddy, how late does the band play?”
“Oh, about half a beat behind the drummer.”
Hey, did you hear about the drummer who finished high school?
Me neither.
Why does everyone keep saying that drummers always lose their watches?
They know drummers have trouble keeping time.
Ever wondered what a drummer’s favorite Pokemon is?
Rattata.
Did you hear about the drummer who took his whole family to watch a movie about drums?
They watched ‘Drum and Drummer’.
What is one thing a drummer says when someone asks him about his earnings?
“I’m Rich, Buddy!”
At a concert, someone asked, “How late does the band play?”
Someone replied, “Just about half a beat behind the drummer.”
What is a drummer’s favorite vegetable?
Beats.
Drummer Jokes for Kids
Delight young drumming enthusiasts with age-appropriate jokes that march to the beat of innocence, promising wholesome amusement for budding musicians. Let’s dig in.
Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car?
So they can park in the handicapped spot.
An amateur drummer died and went to heaven.
He was waiting outside the pearly gates when he heard the most incredible fast and furious drumming coming from within.
Immediately he recognized the playing and rushed to ask St. Peter if that was Buddy Rich playing drums inside the gates. St. Peter responded: “No, that’s God. He just thinks he’s Buddy Rich.”
What’s the first thing a drummer says when he moves to LA?
“Would you like fries with that, sir?
What is the difference between a drummer and a savings bond?
One will mature and make money.
An amateur drummer died and went to heaven.
He heard sounds, and it sounded a lot like Buddy Rich playing drums and ripping solos on the kit. When he asked an angel who that was, the angel replied that it was God, and Buddy Rich was his idol.
What did the drummer say before he was kicked out of the band?
Hey, I thought I’d share some song ideas I’ve written.
How do you count drummers?
1, 2 … 1, 2, 3, 4.
A good drummer, a bad drummer, a trumpeter and a clarinetist are standing im each corner of a football field
You throw $100 in the middle of the field. Who gets the money first?
The bad drummer. There are no good drummers, the trumpeter doesn’t move for just 100 bucks and the clarinetist didn’t understand the game.
One armed drummer tells a dad joke,
Badum.
What was the last thing the drummer said to the band?
Listen to this guys I wrote us a song.
Kid says to mom “when I grow up I wanna be a drummer!”
Mom says “you can’t do both!”
What do you call a beautiful girl on a drummer’s arm?
A tattoo.
How do you get a drummer off your porch?
Pay him for the pizza.
After an orchestra drummer performed particularly poorly, the conductor sarcastically told him, “when they find someone who can’t play any instrument, they give him two sticks and make him the drummer.”
The drummer retorted, “and if he can’t play that either, they take away one stick and make him the conductor.”
A drummer got a tattoo of their drum kit… [OC]
…it was very cymbalic.
What does a ska drummer do when they drop a stick?
Pickitup pickitup pickitup!
A drummer got sentenced to prison for repeatedly beating up people.
He got his repercussions.
How do you know a hat belongs to a little drummer boy?
It has a proper pom-pom, proper pom-pom, proper pom-pom
What’s the difference between a drum machine and a drummer?
You only need to punch instructions into a drum machine once.
I’m addicted to being a bad drummer
I wanted to quit but I just couldn’t beat it.
How do you catch a drummer?
By laying down a snare.
How many jokes are there about drummers?
At least a zildjian.
Cowboys are sitting around a campfire when they hear dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum, one cowboys says to the others, I don’t like the sound of that drum… A indian brave hollars from the woods.. we don’t either but our regular drummer is out sick.
One-night stands are great with drummers
As opposed to guitarists, there’s no strings attached.
How do you confuse a drummer?
Give him sheet music.
Who is the drummer for the Austrialian Beatles cover band?
ɹɐʇs oƃuᴉp.
With all this quarantining we have to be especially careful of drummers.
When this is over they’re gonna come out thinking they can play guitar and sing.
What’s the last thing a drummer says in a band?
“Hey guys, why don’t we try one of my songs…”
What does a drummer use for contraception?
Their personality !
Drummer Jokes and Puns
Experience a melodic medley of puns and jokes centered around drummers. Each playful twist and turn delivers a harmonious blend of humor in musical comedy.
Why should a drummer know geometry?
To master his musical scales.
Did you hear the loud noises coming from the loft?
It was very drum-attic.
What would happen if a sheep, a drum, and a snake all fell together?
Baaa dum tssss!
If a drummer was a producer of Alice in Wonderland, who would he choose as a prince?
Stevie Wonder.
What band do scientists love?
Metallica.
What is a thing a drummer says when someone asks him about his earnings?
“I’m Rich, Buddy!”
How many drummers does it take to screw a light bulb?
Five, one to screw and the others to watch and say, “Yeah, we too can do it.”
What is the difference between a drummer and a guitar?
A drummer has no strings attached.
What would a drummer’s go-to bakery be?
Ginger Baker-y.
What is the main distinction between a bull and a drummer?
A bull knows when to quit beating.
What’s the last thing a drummer says in a KFC establishment?
“Would you prefer to have drumsticks with one of my songs?”
Who would a drummer call if she had electricity issues at her house?
AC/DC.
Final Thoughts
In life’s grand symphony, let laughter craft its unique rhythm.
Share these delightful drummer jokes, fostering harmonies of boundless joy and camaraderie.
Together, let’s conduct an ever-building crescendo of amusement, each joke resonating like notes in a melodic composition.
Your comments play a vital role, akin to the cymbals in this symphonic arrangement, enriching our collective enjoyment.
As we synchronize our humor, may this ensemble of jokes about drummer echo through the corridors of our existence, uniting us in the timeless melody of shared laughter.
Join in, contribute, and let our chorus of wit create a harmonious echo that reverberates through hearts and minds.
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