“Laughter is the best medicine,” as the famous English proverb goes, and what better way to tickle your funny bone than with an amazing collection of ear jokes that will have you in stitches?
In this uproarious blog post, we have compiled sidesplittingly hilarious jokes about ears that will leave you grinning from ear to ear.
These jokes are sure to brighten up your day and fill it with laughter.
As the renowned humorist Mark Twain once said, “The human race has only one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.”
So, grab the cup of coffee, sit back, and get ready to enjoy a hearty dose of laughter as our assortment of ear jokes will surely leave you wanting more.
Best Ear Jokes
Are you ready for ear-resistible humor? Look no further than these hilarious ear jokes! These clever quips are sure to have you laughing out loud. So, put on your listening ears and be ready to enjoy some comedic gold. Who knew that ears could be so funny?
When the singer hit the high note, it was an ear-reversible experience.
Your puns about ears aren’t very sound.
Why did the ear refuse to listen?
It had a closed mind.
Is it possible to hear too many dad jokes?
Asking for an ear-itated friend.
I’m having a pun-derful time coming up with these ear-onic jokes.
Why did the deaf man date a musician?
He liked to feel sound waves.
The sound of the ice cream truck coming is ear-resistible.
What do you call a nervous ear?
A hearing aid.
Why did the ear join the gym?
It wanted to tone up its drum muscles.
Why did the ear refuse to go out on a date?
It heard it all before.
What’s the best way to talk to a deaf ear?
You have to spell it out.
Why do earbuds get bullied by other headphones?
They’re always sticking to themselves.
How does an ear get fit?
It does ear-obics.
Why did the hearing aid win an award?
It was the most “outspoken” one.
Funny Ear Jokes
Looking for some light-hearted and hilarious entertainment? Look no further than this collection of funny ear jokes! You’ll be sure to chuckle, giggle, and belly laugh your way through our pun-filled list. So sit back, and let these jokes tickle your funny bone – or should we say, your eardrums!
What do you call an ear that can’t hear?
A jelly’d ear.
What did one ear say to the other?
Don’t worry, we’ll get through this to-gather.
Why don’t ears like to go on roller coasters?
They fear the drops.
What do you get when you cross an ear and a fridge?
Cool ears.
Why was the therapist always looking into people’s ears?
She was trying to give sound advice.
What do pirates and ears have in common?
They both hear with an arrrrr.
What did the ear say to the eyeball?
You’re irisistible.
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogey in it.
Did you hear about the ear that got in trouble with the law?
It was charged with eavesdropping.
Why did the ear celebrate?
It finally made it to the big leagues and was named an auricle.
What did one ear say to the other after a hearing test?
It sounds like we’re in treble.
What do you call a magical ear?
A hEARsayer.
What do you call a doctor who only treats ears?
An otolaryngolo-gist.
Big Ear Jokes
Have you ever heard the saying, “big ears, big personality”? Well, we have found jokes that definitely live up to that statement! They will have you laughing out loud. And don’t worry, you don’t need to have big ears to appreciate the humor. So what are you waiting for? Grab a friend (or a bunny with big ears) and get ready to giggle your way through these big ear jokes!
What’s gray, has big ears, and a trunk?
A mouse on vacation.
The man with the big feet lives in the red house, the man with the big ears in the green house, the man with the long hair in blue house, where does the man with the small wein live?
My house.
Your mamas head is so big it will take 500 years for it to go into one ear and out the other.
Humans need 7 filters. 2 for the eyes, 2 for the ears, 2 for the nostrils and a big 1 for the mouth.
What has big ears, brings Easter treats, and goes hippity-THUD, hippity-THUD, hippity-THUD?
The Easter Elephant.
Mom! Mom! The mean kids keep saying I have big ears!
“Oh really? I’ll talk to them. Where are they?”
“In the next town over!”
What do you call people with big ears?
Nothing, they might hear you.
Why Do Elephants Have Big Ears?
Because Noddy won’t pay the ransom!
What’s Pink, has a big appetite, and squeaks kirby.
You were expecting a pig, but I didn’t mention a snout , ears, or a curly pink tail.
2 VD germs 2 VD germs crossing the road and a big lorry hurtles towards them.
One says to the other ‘Looks like we’re a goner ear.
Short Ear Jokes
Ears may not seem like the most humorous body part, but trust us, these short ear jokes will have you cracking up in no time. From puns to one-liners, this list covers all the bases. So whether you have small ears or big ears, you’ll be sure to find a joke that suits you. So why not give your ears a little laugh and check out these short ear jokes.
Why did the earbuds break up?
They just couldn’t connect anymore.
What did one ear say to the other during their fight?
Let’s put this behind us.
Why did the ears get arrested?
They were caught eavesdropping.
Why did the ear enjoy going to concerts?
It always heard great things.
Why did the ear go on a diet?
It had too much ear candy.
What did the conversation between the two ears sound like?
Hear today, gone tomorrow.
Why did the ear hire a lawyer?
It had a case of hearing loss.
Why did the ear need a backup plan?
It was afraid of going out of ear shot.
What’s the best type of music for your ears?
Rap music!
Why did the ear refuse to hear small talk?
It was a big listener.
How did the ear know the music was getting too loud?
It had a decibel of doubt.
Why did the ear go to the doctor?
It had too much wax-sical buildup.
Why did the ear leave the party early?
It was tired of hearing the same old puns.
I asked my ear if it was feeling clogged.
It replied, “I can’t hear you, I’ve got a blockage!”
Why couldn’t the ear choose which movie to watch?
Nothing caught its ear.
Ear Jokes One Liners
Looking for a good way to break the ice and get some laughs going? Look no further than these ear jokes one liners that will have you laughing uncontrollably. Whether you’re trying to impress your friends with your humor or just looking for a good laugh yourself, these ear jokes are the perfect pick-me-up. So, sit back and get ready to have your ears tickled with our hilarious collection of ear jokes.
I’m all ears, tell me your jokes!
That joke really struck a chord with my ears.
Ear today, gone tomorrow.
Ears to hoping we’ll hear more puns like this!
I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard that hilarious pun!
What did the left ear say to the right ear?
I just wanted to let you know that I’m all ears!
It was music to my ears when I finally found a good pun on ear jokes.
Give me a minute to clean my EARS, I can’t hear you over the wax.
I didn’t hear what you said, but it sounds ear-responsible.
Ear-ly to bed and ear-ly to rise.
Did you hear about that ear that got divorced?
It was tired of hearing the same old things.
I don’t trust people who have pierced ears, they’re always up to something.
My ears are ringing with joy from all these puns!
I’ve been ear for a good time, but these puns are giving me EARGASMS!
That sound really falls on deaf ears for me.
These ear puns are so bad, they should be outlawed and buried in a shallow earth!
The elephant couldn’t fit through the door because it had big ears.
I’m almost certain that hearing these puns explained why my allergies have been EAR-ritating me.
What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a trampoline and a well-dressed man on a trampoline?
Attitude, my dear. Attitude makes all the difference.
You should always put your best foot, err, ear forward!
I can’t say this pun is particularly ear-esting, but it’s still worth a giggle.
Clean Ear Jokes
Whether you’re trying to impress your crush or just looking for a funny joke to tell at your next family gathering, these clean ear jokes are sure to do the trick. So why not give them a try and see how many people you can get laughing along with you? Who knows, you might just find yourself becoming the life of the party.
I’m all about that bass, no treble in my ear puns.
In one ear and out the other, these puns stick with me!
Let’s not beat around the bush…ear puns are the best!
It’s a sound decision to appreciate ear puns.
I’m always listening for good ear puns.
These puns are music to my ears!
My ears are ringing with all these puns!
These puns tickle my ears!
I’m really trying to drum up some good ear puns.
You’ve really got an ear for these puns.
With ears like mine, I’m always hearing ear puns.
I don’t mean to be nosy, but do you like ear puns?
People may roll their eyes, but I say ear puns are the hear-ald of good puns!
Ear puns are clearly the best.
I’m tuned in to these ear puns.
Dirty Ear Jokes
Ready to have some fun? Get ready to chuckle with these hilarious and maybe a little bit dirty ear jokes! Ears might not be the most popular subject for comedy, but when you combine them with a little bit of mischief, the result is pure hilarity. So go ahead, have a laugh, and enjoy these playful jokes that will have everyone ringing with laughter.
A lady comes home from her doctors appointment grinning from ear to ear.
Her husband asks, “Why are you so happy?”
The wife says, “The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old.”
“Oh yeah?” quipped her husband, “What did he say about your forty-five year old ass?”
She said, “Your name never came up in the conversation.”
So there I am, alone with my girlfriend. She leans closer and whispers in my ear. . .
“Tell me something you’ve never told anyone at all.”
After a pause, I whisper back “I think the Owl People are already among us.”
“Who?”
“Holy shit!”
I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she whispered in my ear “You have the biggest penis I’ve ever laid my hands on!”
I said “Na, you’re just pullin’ my leg!”
Did you know if you hold your ear up to a strangers leg, you can actually hear them say “what the fuck are you doing?”
The victim was found with semen in her ear.
I guess you could say she could hear the killer coming.
I started my new job as a bingo caller last night and halfway through calling the numbers I farted loudly. My boss immediately came over and whispered in my ear, “Don’t do that again.”
“Sorry,” I said, “It must be the nerves.”
“Fair enough,” he replied, “But there was no need to hold the microphone directly on your asshole.”
I fucked a girl in her ear.
I should get tested because she now has hearing aids.
I never used to think I was very sexy. I always hated my eyes, ears and nose.
Then one day, I came to my senses.
This little kindergartener runs into school and yells “Miss! Miss! There’s a dead cat outside!”
And she goes “well how do you know it’s dead?”
And he goes “well I pissed in its ear and it didn’t move so it must be dead.”
And she goes into shock, “Oh my god! You did what? You pissed in the dead cats ear?”
And the boy responds confused, “Yeah Miss, I bent down and put my lips to its ear and whispered ‘pssst’ and it wouldn’t move!”
A man asks his wife if he can cum in her ear…
She says, “No, I’ll go deaf.”
He says, “Funny, I always cum in your mouth and you never shut the fuck up.”
As a boy, I was made to believe that earwigs lived in ears.
Henceforth, I was terrified of cockroaches.
The other night my wife and I were getting busy in bed….
She whispered in my ear “turn off the light and shove it in my arse”. I guess I should have waited for the bulb to cool down first.
Is sex better for men or women?
I just had a discussion with my wife about sex being better for either men or women.
She said; “Of course for women! When you have that itch in your ear, and you put your finger in to scratch it, where does it feel better? On your finger or in the ear?!”
I still am speechless.
My girlfriend has a pussy like a mouse’s ear.
Mickey’s, unfortunately.
I have six eyes, two mouths and three ears, what am I?
Fucking ugly.
Why do doctors recommend avoiding sexual contact with the ears?
Hearing Aids.
I apologised to my girlfriend during sex for slipping it in the wrong hole.
But of course she couldn’t hear me with my dick in her ear.
Sex therapists claim that the best way to arouse a man is to spend 10 minutes licking his ears.
Personally I think it’s nuts.
Proof that a cockroach has ears in its legs.
If you scream at it, it runs away.
If you take off its legs then scream at it, it won’t run.
The son comes home with an ear piercing in his left ear. The father looks at him and says:
– Son, there are two types of men who have an earring.
Gays and pirates.
Now I’m gonna look out this window and you better hope I see a ship.
A man walks into the Doctor with a carrot in his ear, a runner bean in the other and a cucumber up his arse
‘Well’ says the Doctor ‘You’re clearly not eating properly’
What’s the most sensitive part of a man’s body during masturbation?
His ears.
Ear Jokes for Adults
Are you ready to have a good laugh? Well, we’ve got these ear jokes that are sure to tickle your funny bone – or should we say, your ear drum. These jokes are perfect for adults who love a bit of humor with a touch of wit. So why not put on your listening ears and get ready to laugh until you can’t hear yourself think!
Why did the ear’s phone go straight to voicemail?
It was feeling a little disconnected.
I can’t hear you because my ears are tied.
What do you call an ear that likes to party?
An auralite.
Why did the ear cross the road?
To get to the other (auditory) canal.
I heard your ear is a great listener, maybe it should be your therapist.
What do you call an ear with an attitude?
A cauli-flower ear.
Is it me or does this ear of corn look like it is listening to us?
Why couldn’t the ear hear the joke?
It was too corny.
You gotta ear it to believe it!
You need to give me your undivided ear-tention.
What did the grape say when the elephant accidentally stepped on it?
Nothing. It just let out a little whine – right in the elephant’s ear.
Noisicles – the sound your ears make when it’s really cold outside.
Our boss is all ears when it comes to new ideas.
My friend told me that she pierced her ear with a pencil. It was leady.
A person’s ears are a dead giveaway to their age.
Ear Jokes for Kids
Looking to tickle your kids’ funny bone? Check out these ear jokes that are sure to make them giggle! These jokes are perfect for car rides, bedtime stories, or just when your kids need a good laugh. So what are you waiting for? It’s time to get ear-resistibly funny!
Hearing aids?
More like hearing adds!
Earwax is just tiny brown screams from our inner ear.
Ear infections are just gross over-hearings.
Would you like to hear my ear-resistible song?
They say if you listen to the sound of an avocado ripening, it’s an ear-peeling experience.
People love ear puns; they’re ear-resistible.
There’s no need to shout, I hear you ear and clear.
I can’t hear you, I have my guava over my ears.
I was going to tell you a joke about ears, but it’s a little hard to hiss.
Claire could hear the ocean better because she had better seal over her ears.
Despite her hearing problems, Vivian was always ear-opean to new ideas.
Ear you go! Another pun.
Hearing loss is not a laughing matter, unless it’s a pun.
She heard it through the grapevine… and her vines perk up every time.
Ear-nestly trying to come up with more ear puns.
Ear Jokes and Puns
Discover the lighter side of sound anatomy as you giggle your way through these hilarious ear-themed jokes. Whether you’re an audiophile or simply in need of a good laugh, these puns are sure to bring a smile to your face. So, sit back and prepare to be ear-resistibly entertained!
I have an ear for music, but only if the music is loud enough to make me deaf.
Not everyone understands wordplay and puns, it’s an acquired ear.
I can’t hear you over the deafening sound of silence in these halls.
Why do dishes break?
Because they hear forks against them and just can’t stand it.
I found a small cat stuck in my ear, but it’s okay, I think it’s just a purr-sasive earring.
You must have heard it through the grapevine that I love ear jokes.
Never trust an atom, they make up everything, including the things you hear with your ears.
I told my girlfriend that I wanted her to nibble on my ear, but then chaos ensued, turns out she thought I said “mumble in my rear.”
How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb up a tree and act like a nut?
No, just put out some acorn-ear traps.
I heard you were interested in a hearing aid, so I got one for you.
What? Speak up!
I heard you have a great ear for music!
I’ve got you ear-marked as a pun lover.
Don’t turn a deaf ear to my puns!
Hear ye, hear ye! The ear puns have arrived!
I was all ears when you said there’d be puns!
Final Thoughts
In conclusion, we hope these hilarious ear jokes have brightened up your day and given you a good laugh.
From puns to one-liners, we’ve covered it all.
Whether you’re in need of a pick-me-up or just looking for some witty jokes to share with friends, this list has got you covered.
But let’s not forget the real star of the show here – our ears!
Let’s take a moment to appreciate the role they play in our daily lives and remember to care for them properly.
And as always, we would love to hear from you.
Let us know which joke was your favorite or if you have any other jokes about ears that we missed.
So go ahead and leave a comment in the comments section below – we’d love to hear from you!
Thanks for reading and keep those ears happy!
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