Prepare for a giggle-fest with our Pope jokes that guarantee laughter and good times!
We’ve gathered a bunch of funny quips and light-hearted anecdotes about the Pope to add some joy to your day.
These jokes take a playful approach to papal life, offering a humorous twist that’s perfect for everyone.
Our curated collection of jokes about the Pope is here to entertain, no matter if you’re a committed believer or just looking for a fun distraction.
Click to enjoy the humor now!
Best Pope Jokes
Discover the comedic catechism with the best Pope jokes! These divine quips are like holy laughter sprinkled with heavenly humor, making it a truly blessed experience.
Why did Popeye beat up the Pope?
He heard he was going to Mount Olive.
A. Schwarzenegger has it long, Brad Pitt short, Madonna does not have it and the Pope does not use it. What is it?
A surname.
I heard the Pope’s first choice for a guest was in fact Hillary…
But he couldn’t afford her speaking fees
The Pope walks into a synagogue…
The rabbi says, “Why the wrong faith?”
The pope walks into a mosque.
The imam says “Hey, why the wrong faith?”
How does the Pope make online purchases?
Using his Papal account.
What do you call it when somebody kills a perfect circle of religious leaders?
A 360 No-Pope.
What do you call a traveling Pope?
A Roamin’ Catholic.
Why hasn’t there been a black pope?
Because black men are afraid of being fathers.
So the Pope joined twitter so he can “Reach out to a younger generation.”
He is certainly not the first Catholic to have done that.
Clint Eastwood, the Pope, and Yoda walk into the bar…
It was at this point I realized I had done WAY too many tequila shots.
Trump’s is short, and Arnold Schwarzenegger’s is long; Madonna doesn’t have one, and the Pope is not supposed to use his. Of course I’m talking about…
… their last name.
For some reason the Pope didn’t…
sponsor my program for terminally ill Chinese children. He said he didn’t like the name – What’s wrong with “Youth in Asia”???
The new Pope got Bird flu…
…I heard he caught it from one of his Cardinals.
What does the Pope use to clean his counters?
A Papal towel.
How does the pope refer to his secret superhero identity?
It’s his altar ego.
It’s ridiculous that the pope has to go around surrounded by armed guards these days
I know he’s a priest but he’s not going to do anything out in public
What’s the difference between a Pope and acne?
Acne doesn’t come on a boy’s face until he is around 12.
What type of car does the pope drive.
A Christler.
What is the Catholic Church giving up for Lent?
The Pope!
What’s The Pope’s favorite chord?
G Sus.
How do you castrate the pope?
Kick the altar boy in the chin.
The Pope walks into a synagogue, the Rabbi asks, “Why the wrong faith?”
The pope blessed the people of Ireland today.
So don’t pick a fight with an Irishman. For a short time, all their attacks do maximum damage.
A blond, a rabbi, a schoolkid, a lawyer, a prostitute, the pope, a pirate and George Bush walk into a bar…
The bartender says:
Is this a joke?
What did the Pope call Batman when he caught him leaving church early?
Christian Bale.
What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive?
Popeye almost killed him!
Donald Trump, the Pope, the oldest man in the world and a 10 year old are all on a plane when it is about to crash.
Donald Trump reaches for the boys backpack when the German Pilot regained control of the plane and says ‘no jokes’
The pope just twitted negative for the coronavirus.
Which is a good thing since touches a lot of people day to day.
Why the pope prefers twenty one year olds?
There’s twenty of them.
You heard about the Pope getting stuck in the elevator right?
When asked to comment he said it was an elevating experience.
What pronouns does the Pope go by?
He/hymn.
A list of world leaders and whether or not they own a fried chicken chain.
Trump: No.
Merkel: No.
Putin: No.
Trudeaux: No.
Pope: Yes.
What is Pope Francis’ favorite genre of music?
Shoegaze.
Where does the Pope swim?
In the Holy See.
When asked what sort of women he would consider sleeping with, the pope replied
Nun.
For Halloween I’m going to dress my dog up as a famous pope.
I was thinking Pope John Paw.
Have you heard about Pope Harry?
I was told he smells quite nice.
Why do stoners love the Pope?
He sell a bit.
Why does the Pope kiss the ground after he lands?
He flies Alitalia.
Pope Francis warns the public about the evils of Horoscope readings…
Born: December 17, “Your ideas are abstract and don’t always make reasonable sense.”
What a Sagittarius thing to say…
What is the painting in Milwaukee of Pope Benedict called using 17,000 Colored Condoms?
Eggs Benedict.
The Pope, Hitler and Batman walk into a bar.
Bartender says, “Holy Seisse Batman.”
A child molester, old dude, and pope enter a bar…
And he orders a drink.
“Betty White”
What the African American said when he heard there was a new Pope.
How do Protestants like their orange juice?
without Pope.
What did the people say when a mole was elected as Pope?
HOLEY MOLEY!
Funny Pope Jokes
Prepare for a divine comedy show with these funny Pope jokes! From heavenly jests to sacred silliness, these quips are sure to have you laughing in holy delight.
Why did the Pope start a bakery?
Because he kneads a lot of dough!
What did the Pope say when he won the poker game?
“I pope’d you all!”
Why did the Pope become an astronaut?
He wanted to explore the space between Heaven and Earth!
What did the Pope say to the barber when getting a haircut?
“I’m not here for a blessing, I’m here for a trim!”
Did you hear about the Pope’s new job?
He’s a part-time rapper now, he goes by MC Pope.
Why did the Pope bring an umbrella to the Vatican?
In case there was a holy water leak!
What did the Pope say to the pianist?
“Holy keys!”
What do you call a nun who just got promoted?
A pro-motion.
Who is the Pope’s favorite superhero?
Popeye!
Hilarious Pope Jokes
Ready for a chuckle-filled pilgrimage through humor? These Pope jokes are like friendly guides, leading you on a journey of laughs and joy. Get ready to smile!
Why does the Pope wear Crocs?
Because they’re holey.
TIL the Pope is elected by the Cardinals.
You’d think the Angels would do something like that for Mike Trout.
Is the pope an upholsterer?
I heard he’s a man of the cloth.
Which Pope liked fruit the most?
Pope Pius.
Maybe the Pope just wants to finally get married.
Or settle down with a couple of kids.
Why was Pope Ratzinger bad at chess?
Because he only knew how to move the bishops around.
I asked the B-52s where I could find a Pope.
They told me “Rome if you want two!” Had to break the news about benedict to them.
Why does the pope not want to be cremated?
Because he is still alive.
What does Mike Tyson use to chat with the Pope?
Faithtime.
You know why they can’t cremate the pope?
‘cause he ain’t dead yet.
The Pope is sick.
Apparently the Pope resigned because he was sick with bird flu. He got it from a Cardinal.
What kind of meat does the pope eat?
Nun.
Why doesn’t the pope like continuous functions?
They’re not hole-y.
Did you guys hear that pope Benedict died of food poisoning?
He ate a twelve year old weiner.
After weeks of speculation that the new pope would be black…
…alter boys at the Vatican are letting out a collective sigh of relief.
Do you know what would happen if the Pope showed up randomly to a Catholic service?
Mass hysteria.
What do you call a female pope?
Oe.
Short Pope Jokes
Dive into quick laughs with these short Pope jokes! From divine quips to holy chuckles, these bite-sized jests promise instant joy in just a few words.
Why did the Pope go to the doctor?
He had a Papal concussion!
What did the Pope say to the pizza delivery guy?
“Pizza is the answer to all of life’s questions.”
Why was the Pope excommunicated from the church?
He kept using TikTok during mass.
What do you call a Pope who loves pasta?
The Pasta-farian Pope!
Why did the Pope wear a yellow hat?
Because he wanted to be a Canary in the Vatican!
What did the Pope say when he met Elon Musk?
“Your inventions are divine intervention!”
Why did the Pope become a baker?
Because he kneaded the dough!
What did the Pope say when he saw a UFO?
“It’s a bird, it’s a plane, no wait, it’s the Holy Spirit!”
Why did the Pope go to the gym?
To get some holy muscles!
What did the Pope say when he met the Queen of England?
“You’re the queen of my heart!”
Why did the Pope start a podcast?
To spread the Good Word…wide web!
What did the Pope say when he visited the Great Wall of China?
“This wall is truly divine!”
Why did the Pope go to the dentist?
To get his teeth blessed!
What did the Pope say when he met the Dalai Lama?
“We’re both spiritual leaders, but only one of us has the cool hat.”
Why did the Pope go to the beach?
To catch some rays…of sunshine and blessings!
What did the Pope say when he saw a homeless person?
“My son, you are not alone. You have a home in heaven.”
Why did the Pope go to the zoo?
To bless the animals!
What did the Pope say when he met a vegan?
“I respect your dietary choices, my child, but don’t forget about the fishes and loaves.”
Why did the Pope go to the amusement park?
To ride the roller coaster of faith!
What did the Pope say when he saw a rainbow?
“Ah, a sign of God’s promise to humanity!”
Why did the Pope go to the art museum?
To admire the masterpieces and pray for inspiration!
What did the Pope say when he met a musician?
“Keep playing beautiful melodies, my child, it’s a symphony of praise!”
Why did the Pope go to the mountains?
To climb the peak of righteousness!
What did the Pope say when he saw a shooting star?
“Make a wish, my dear, and may it come true by the grace of God.”
Why did the Pope go to the library?
To read the book of life!
What did the Pope say when he met a scientist?
“Your discoveries are a testament to the wonders of creation!”
Why did the Pope go to the coffee shop?
To get a latte blessings!
What did the Pope say when he saw a baby?
“A new life, a new soul, a new blessing from above!”
Why did the Pope go to the garden?
To tend to the flowers of faith!
What did the Pope say when he met a teacher?
“You shape young minds, my dear, and plant seeds of knowledge.”
Why did the Pope go to the grocery store?
To pick up some holy bread and wine!
What did the Pope say when he saw a sunset?
“The sky is painted with colors of love and beauty.”
Why did the Pope go to the hospital?
To heal the sick and offer comfort!
What did the Pope say when he met a firefighter?
“Your bravery is an inspiration to us all!”
Why did the Pope go to the river?
To take a holy dip and renew his spirit!
What did the Pope say when he saw a painting of himself?
“That’s a pretty accurate depiction, except I don’t have a halo yet.”
Why did the Pope go to the circus?
To bless the acrobats and animals!
Pope Jokes One Liners
These one-liner jokes are hilarious and witty punchlines that poke fun at the Pope and his role in the Catholic Church. Get ready to have a good laugh!
Did you hear about the Pope’s new workout routine? He’s really working on his cross-fit!
What do you call a Pope who likes to play guitar? A holy roller!
Why did the Pope start a rock band? He wanted to spread the gospel of rock and roll!
What’s the Pope’s favorite movie genre? Holywood films!
What did the Pope say to the cardinals at the baseball game? “Let us pray for a home run!”
How does the Pope start a letter? “Dear Holy Smokes!”
Why did the Pope start a gardening club? He wanted to cultivate the Holy See-d!
What’s the Pope’s favorite dessert? Angel food cake!
How does the Pope communicate with his staff? Through pray-per messages!
What’s the Pope’s favorite type of music? Gospel!
What’s the Pope’s favorite type of fish? Holy mackerel!
Why did the Pope become a chef? He wanted to make heavenly dishes!
How does the Pope end his sermons? With an amen-dment!
Why did the Pope become a stand-up comedian? He wanted to spread holy laughter!
What do you call a Pope who can juggle? A miracle worker!
Why did the Pope get a pet snake? He wanted a holy hiss-ter!
What do you call a Pope who knows martial arts? A holy ninja!
Why did the Pope start a fashion line? He wanted to create holy attire!
How does the Pope stay in shape? He does soul-crunches!
What’s the Pope’s favorite ice cream flavor? Holy Vanilla!
Why did the Pope become a detective? He wanted to solve divine mysteries!
What do you call a Pope who loves to dance? A disco-stole!
Why did the Pope become a painter? He wanted to create holy art!
How does the Pope take his coffee? With a little bit of heaven!
What do you call a Pope who plays soccer? A goal-keeper of the faith!
Why did the Pope become a gardener? He wanted to cultivate the faith!
Pope Jokes for Adults
Venture into the comedic cloisters with these adult Pope jokes, where irreverent laughs and holy humor collide in a divine spectacle of mirth.
Why did the Pope prefer twenty-one-year-olds?
Because there’s twenty of them.
Did you hear about the Pope getting stuck in the elevator?
When asked to comment, he said it was an elevating experience.
Why did the Pope start a garden?
He wanted to have some divine produce!
What do you call a Pope who weighs all his options before making a decision?
Pope-erational!
Why did the Pope become a painter?
He wanted to experience some holy art!
What do you call a Pope who can solve any mystery?
Pope-ular Sherlock!
Why did the Pope become an athlete?
He wanted to be the holy runner!
What did the Pope say when he became an actor?
“The Papal is my stage!”
Why did the Pope become a pizza chef?
Because he wanted to deliver holy slices!
What did the Pope say when he scored a goal?
“Holy goalkeeper, that was epic!”
Why did the Pope start playing guitar?
Because he wanted to become a rock god!
What do you call a Pope who tells jokes?
Pope-ular comedian!
Why did the Pope go to the music store?
He was looking for some divine tunes!
What did the Pope say when he became a DJ?
“I’m the Holy Mix Master!”
Why did the Pope start a fashion line?
He wanted to bring heavenly styles to the runway!
What did the Pope say when he joined a circus?
“I’m the Holy Juggler!”
Why did the Pope become a lifeguard?
He wanted to make sure everyone had a divine swim!
What do you call a Pope who loves to travel?
Pope trotter!
Pope Jokes for Kids
Delight in the innocence of humor with these Pope jokes for kids. It’s a laughter-filled playground where even the Pope would exchange a smile.
Why did the Pope become a gardener?
He wanted to pray in the holy shrubbery!
Did you hear about the Pope’s gardening skills?
He’s a real blessing in disguise.
Why was the Pope’s pool always cold?
It had too many holes-y water!
What game does the Pope like to play during his free time?
Halo.
How does the Pope like his pizza?
Holy and a-peeling!
Why did the Pope wear a hat to the baseball game?
Because it was holy headgear!
What did the Pope say when he found a broken clock?
‘Time to say a prayer!’
What do you call it when the Pope sneezes?
A papal blessing!
Why did the Pope join a cooking class?
He wanted to perfect his holy guacamole!
What did the Pope say to the actor?
‘Break a kneel!’
Why did the Pope become a beekeeper?
He wanted to make holy honey!
What did the Pope say to the comedian?
‘Holy laughter! You’re a real blessing!’
What’s the Pope’s favorite ice cream flavor?
Holy cannoli!
Why did the Pope open a bakery?
Because he wanted to create some holy rolls!
Did you hear about the Pope who had a boat?
He named it Vatican Ship!
Why did the Pope go on a diet?
He wanted to be a little more holy!
The Pope isn’t very good at tennis.
He struggles with his serve, always sending them out of apostolic!
Pope Francis is a great gardener.
He really knows his way around a veggie-canal!
The Pope decided to become a magician.
His favorite trick is turning wine into holy spirits!
Why did the Pope start a band?
He wanted to be the head of the Holy Singers Association!
The Pope isn’t very good at geography.
He always gets Vatican City and Las Vegas Papal up!
Why did the Pope become a chef?
He wanted to give his meals a divine taste!
What did the Pope say when he won a game of chess?
“Check-Mate-ic Bless!”
The Pope is a big pasta lover.
His favorite dish is Papal-delicious Alfredo!
Why did the Pope get a job at the post office?
He wanted to deliver some heavenly packages!
The Pope loves to fish.
His favorite catch is Holy Mackerel!
What do you call a Pope who can juggle?
Holy Balancicus!
The Pope is a big fan of rap music.
His favorite artist is Pontific Jay-Z!
Why did the Pope bring a ladder to the concert?
To get closer to the popemobile!
What is the Pope’s favorite party game?
Papal-razzi!
The Pope loves to play hide-and-seek.
His favorite hiding spot is beneath the papal-grounds!
Why did the Pope start growing herbs?
He wanted to have some fresh Basil-ica!
The Pope loves to watch action movies.
His favorite character is James Pontific!
Pope Jokes and Puns
Unveil the comedic treasures with these Pope jokes and puns. It’s a divine comedy showcase where every punchline is a sacred revelation.
I asked the pope if he could tell me a pun about pizza. He responded, “I don’t know, it’s a little cheesy.
The pope has a knack for coming up with puns. His skills are truly hol(e)y.
The pope said his pun game was weak, but I told him not to worry because he can always pray for better ones.
The pope told me a pun about a ladder. It was a step up from his previous jokes.
The pope made a pun about chess, saying it was a bishop move.
The pope attempted a pun about a choir, but it fell a little flat. He must be out of vocal chords.
The pope tried to come up with a pun about the moon, but he could only come up with a half-asse(t) one.
I asked the pope if he could tell me a pun about the ocean, but he said he’d have to sea about that.
The pope made a pun about a bakery, saying it kneaded some more jokes.
I told the pope I loved puns, and he responded, “You’re a pun in a million!”
The pope said his puns are always timely, but I joked that they’re more like paw-nly.
The pope tried to make a pun about pasta, but it spaghetti-tangled his tongue.
I asked the pope if he had any puns about medieval times. He said, “I jest can’t knight-brush my comedic skills.”
The pope made a pun about a forest, saying it was a tree-mendous place to relax.
I asked the pope if he could tell me a pun about fruit. He replied, “I’m all a-plummed out!”
The pope tried to think of a pun about architecture, but he kept hitting a wall.
The pope made a pun about birds, saying they’re always wing-ing it.
I asked the pope if he had a pun about the solar system. He replied, “That’s a universal joke!”
The pope tried to make a pun about fashion, but his style was a bit holy outdated.
I told the pope I needed a good pun, and he responded, “Well, I pope you find one soon!
The pope’s favorite dessert is holy cannoli.
The pope told his followers to have faith and papalatte.
The pope is feeling a bit holy waterlogged.
The pope’s prayers were answered and he was popping with joy.
The pope told the priests to make sure the devil doesn’t get a popemobile.
The pope’s favorite snack is Poperoxolotl chips.
The pope always carries a pen so he can popely answer questions.
The pope said he feels blessed when he wears his popewatch.
The pope said the key to happiness is to follow the poperoad.
The pope warned the cardinals not to be led a-popetray.
The pope’s sneezes are said to be heavenly achoos.
The pope said he never gets bored because there’s always popecorn to enjoy.
The pope said he loves to unwind with some holy popesicle.
The pope said he’s always on the move, he’s a popemobile of energy.
The pope said he likes to start his morning with a prayer and some holy popetarts.
The pope said he prefers to sleep on a popedal bed.
The pope said he has a strong intuition, he always popes his gut feelings.
The pope said he enjoys a good game of poker, but he always popes his face.
The pope said he has a lot on his mind, it’s like a popestacle course.
The pope said he always takes pride in his appearance, he’s a popedarazzi’s dream.
The pope started a fashion line called “Holy Couture.”
The pope is training to become a breakdancer in his spare time. He’s working on his holy moves.
The pope opened a gym called “Holy Fits.
The pope decided to open a pizza restaurant called “Holy Pepperoni.
The pope is collaborating with a rapper on a new album called “Holy Hip-Hop.”
The pope went on a roller coaster and exclaimed, “Holy roller!
The pope started a gardening show called “Holy Mole-y Green Thumb.
The pope is learning to play the guitar and started a rock band called “Holy Harmonies.”
The pope started a comedy club called “Holy Laughter.”
The pope became a hairdresser and opened a salon called “Holy Scissors.”
The pope went skydiving and shouted, “Holy free fall!
The pope has a side gig as a DJ and calls himself “DJ Holy Beats.”
The pope invented a new dance move called the “Holy Shake.
The pope took up photography and opened a studio called “Holy Shots.
The pope is a big baseball fan and cheers, “Holy home run!
The pope became a stand-up comedian and performs at “Holy Chuckles Comedy Club.”
The pope opened a bakery called “Holy Rolls.”
The pope started a car repair shop called “Holy Wheels.
The pope began a travel agency called “Holy Adventures.”
The pope discovered a new planet and named it “Holy Cosmos.
Final Thoughts
Saying goodbye to our exploration of Pope jokes, we hope these chuckles have brightened your moments.
These jokes about Pope aimed to bring a bit of humor into your day and make you smile.
Now that you’ve had a good laugh, why not spread the joy? Share these jokes with others – laughter has a magical way of connecting us.
Did any joke stand out to you, or was there a particular moment that brought a smile to your face?
Feel free to share your favorite joke or any suggestions you might have – we’re all ears!
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