What you don’t know might truly hurt you when it comes to marriage and questions to ask before marriage can help you out right away.
Relationship experts say that many couples tend to overlook or avoid questions to ask before getting married that can help lay the groundwork for a solid marriage, whether out of shyness, boredom, or a desire to maintain romantic mystery.
Those who are thinking about getting married today expect their spouse to be both their best friend and their confidant, in addition to desiring someone with whom they can raise children and have a comfortable life.
But truth is after getting married, some suddenly find due to insufficient communication, they have had misunderstandings about their partner or some major issues that could even possibly lead to a divorce.
The following intimate and occasionally painful questions to ask before marriage are meant to elicit sincere conversations and maybe provide couples with a window of opportunity to reveal secrets before it’s too late.
Best Questions to Ask before Marriage
Before getting married, ask your significant other the following questions. It won’t be so simple, but it will be worth it in the long run. Let’s stroll down this list of best questions to ask before marriage to choose from.
1. What do you expect the relationship between your spouse and your family to be like?
2. Is there anyone in your family that lives with you now?
3. Are you planning to have anyone in your family live with you in the future?
4. If for any reason my relationship with your family turns sour, what should be done?
5. Who are your friends? Identify at least three.
6. What is the role of a husband?
7. What is the role of a wife?
8. Do you want to practice polygamy?
9. What is your relationship with your family?
0. What do you expect your relationship to be like with the family of your spouse?
11. What is your understanding of an Islamic marriage?
12. What are you expecting of your spouse, religiously?
13. What is your relationship between yourself and the Muslim community in your area?
14. Are you volunteering in any Islamic activities?
15. What can you offer your mate, spiritually?
16. Identify three things that you want to accomplish in the near future.
17. Identify three things that you want to accomplish, long-term.
18. Why have you chosen me as your potential spouse?
19. What is the role of religion in your life – now?
20. Are you a spiritual person?
21. What is your concept of marriage?
22. Have you ever been married before?
23. Are you married now?
24. What are your expectations of marriage?
25. What are your goals in life? Long term and short term plans.
26. How did you get to know them?
27. Why are they your friends?
28. What do you like most about them?
29. What will your relationship with them be like after marriage?
30. Do you have friends from the opposite sex?
31. What is the level of your relationship with them – now?
32. What will be the level of your relationship with them after marriage?
33. What type of relationship do you want your spouse to have with your friends?
34. What are the things that you do in your free time?
35. Do you like to have guests in your home for entertainment?
36. What are you expecting from your spouse when your friends come to the house?
37. What is your opinion of speaking other languages in the home that I do not understand? With friends? With family?
38. Do you travel?
39. How do you spend your vacations?
Deep Questions to Ask Before Marriage
In just one day, you can get married, and then you have the rest of your lives to consider. So share your vision for the future with your significant other through these deep questions to ask before marriage.
1. Define mental, verbal, emotional, and physical abuse.
2. What would you do if you felt that you had been abused?
3. Who would you call for assistance if you were being abused?
4. Do you suffer from any chronic disease or condition?
5. Are you willing to take a physical exam by a physician, before marriage?
6. How do you express anger?
7. How do you expect your spouse to express anger?
8. What do you do when you are angry?
9. When do you think it is appropriate to initiate mediation in a marriage?
10. When there is a dispute in your marriage, religious or not, how should the conflict be resolved?
11. How much time passes before you choose to forgive someone?
12. How do you make important and less important decisions in your life?
13. Do you use foul language at home? In public? With your family?
14. Do your friends use foul language?
15. Does your family use foul language?
16. How do you express your admiration for someone that you know – now?
17. How do you express your feelings to someone who has done a favor for you?
18. Do you like to write your feelings?
19. If you wrong someone, how do you apologize?
20. If someone has wronged you, how do you want them to apologize to you?
21. How do you think your spouse should spend vacations?
22. Do you read?
23. What do you read?
24. After marriage, do you think that you are one to express romantic feelings verbally?
25. After marriage, do you think that you want to express affection in public?
26. What is your understanding of proper health and nutrition?
27. How do you support your own health and nutrition?
28. If so, how do you think a dual-income family should manage funds?
29. Do you currently use a budget to manage your finances?
30. Who are the people to whom you are financially responsible?
31. Do you support the idea of utilizing baby-sitters and maids?
32. Do you have any debts now? If so, how are you making progress to eliminate the debt?
33. How do you think that your use of money will change after marriage?
34. Do you support the idea of taking loans to buy a home?
35. What are you expecting from your spouse financially?
36. What is your financial responsibility in a marriage?
37. Do you support the idea of a working wife?
38. What is your definition of wealth?
39. How do you spend your money?
40. How do you save your money?
Funny Questions to Ask Before Marriage
Don’t forget to enjoy yourself. Include some entertainment and lifestyle topics in your list of funny questions to ask before marriage to learn what your future spouse believes and to get know how about each other.
1. Do you dream about me in your sleep?
2. If we could only eat one kind of food for the rest of our lives, what would it be?
3. What is the most memorable moment of our courtship days?
4. What would you like me to do to make our marriage more thrilling and exciting?
5. Where would you like both of us to go right now?
6. Based on our relationship, what advice would you give people who are dating?
7. If today was your last day, what would you want me to prepare for you as your last meal?
8. What song perfectly describes our relationship?
9. What three things should we definitely take if we were to live on a secluded island?
10. How would you describe our wildest night?
11. Is there a memory you have of me that always makes you laugh?
12. Which of our dates is your favorite one?
13. How would you like to spruce up our romantic relationship?
14. What movie title perfectly describes our life together?
15. What language should we learn together?
16. If we had a pet, what would its name be?
17. Who do you wish we lived closer to?
18. How would you like to spend the rest of our lives when we’re old and wrinkly?
19. Do you check me out when I walk away from you?
20. What is the best thing about us being married?
21. If you could live forever with me by your side, would you?
22. If we started a duo music group, what would our band name be?
23. What new hobby would you like us both to do together next?
24. Would you rather stay here at home with me or go out with for a date with me tonight?
25. If I let you choose my outfit for our next date, what would I be wearing?
26. What do you want me to do to make you fall in love with me even more?
27. What was on your mind when we had our first kiss?
28. If we started our own restaurant, what food would we serve?
29. What would a world wherein we’re the absolute rulers look like?
30. Which of your parents do you think you’re like most?
31. Besides me, what’s your next most favorite thing in the world?
32. Which of your siblings do you think you’re like most?
33. What’s your biggest pet peeve?
34. Has anyone ever saved your life?
35. Have you ever saved anyone’s life?
36. Was there anything noteworthy about the circumstances of your birth?
Important Questions to Ask Before Marriage
Asking questions can occasionally be nerve-wracking, especially if you didn’t negotiate a timescale for your relationship before becoming engaged but they are of utmost importance. Check out this list of few important questions to ask before marriage.
1. What is your idea of perfect relaxation?
2. What makes you really angry? What do you do when you’re really angry?
3. What makes you most joyful? What do you do when you are joyful?
4. What makes you most insecure? How do you handle your insecurities?
5. What makes you most secure?
6. Do you feel like we have enough heart to heart conversations that connect us emotionally?
7. How do you handle your anger?
8. Do you expect or want me to change in certain areas?
9. What amount of available money do you need to have to feel comfortable?
10. Are we both good at apologizing?
11. How much alone time do you need?
12. What are your thoughts about having debt?
13. How do we handle conflict and how could we be better about it?
14. What are the boundaries we want to put in place when it comes to dealing with the opposite sex?
15. What are your expectations about how we will spend our free time?
16. Are we both quick to forgive?
17. What role will your family play in our life together?
18. Do we truly listen to each other and fairly consider one another’s ideas and complaints?
19. How will we make sure we have quality time together no matter how busy we get?
20. What are some of your financial goals?
21. How did your parents show their love to you growing up?
22. Do you have trust issues and insecurities?
23. How will we make decisions together?
24. What is your love language?
25. If we get stuck in our marriage, are you willing to seek outside help with a counselor?
26. Have you ever cheated on someone or been cheated on?
27. How important do you think self-care is?
28. When conflict arises, do you tend to want to fight or avoid it?
29. Can we comfortably and openly discuss our sexual needs, preferences, and fears?
30. Do you want kids? If so, how many and how do you intend to shape our children’s values?
31. What does faith and spirituality mean to you?
32. How important is it to you to keep up physical appearances?
33. Are there some things that you and I are not prepared to give up in the marriage?
34. Do you feel like you can be assertive with me? Why or why not?
35. How do we balance holidays and special occasions with both families and also make sure to have special time for us?
36. Do you fight fair? How do you know?
37. How do you celebrate when something great happens? How do you mourn when something tragic happens?
38. What is your greatest limitation?
39. What is your greatest strength?
Great Questions to Ask Before Marriage
Even if you may have 1,001 questions to ask before getting married, think about including some great questions, like the ones we have selected for you. Walk over these great questions to ask before marriage and use them in conversation with your sweetheart.
1. When was the first time you felt that you were in love with another person? What happened in that relationship, and how have you come to terms with it?
2. What is the longest relationship you have ever had prior to this one? Why did it end, and what lesson did you learn?
3. Have you ever been married? If so, are you divorced or widowed? How do you think you handled the loss?
4. If you have a current partner, do they know of behaviors that you exhibited in your previous relationship that you’re not proud of?
5. What s#xual activities do you enjoy the most?
6. Do you have health insurance? Dental insurance?
7. How important is it that you always look your best?
8. How important is your spouse’s appearance? Do you have strong preferences about being with a particular physical type?
9. Are there cosmetic procedures that you regularly undergo?
10. Is weight control important to you? Is your spouse’s weight important to you?
11. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
12. Do you prefer urban, suburban, or rural settings?
13. Is it important to have your own private home, or do you prefer apartment or condo living, with a management company responsible for the maintenance?
14. Do you prefer to clean your own home or hire a housekeeper?
15. Do you think of your home as a cocoon, or is your door always open?
16. Are there specific sexual acts that make you uncomfortable? Be specific! This is no time to hedge.
17. Do you feel comfortable initiating sex? If yes, why? If no, why?
18. What do you need in order to be in the mood for sex?
19. Have you ever been sexually abused or assaulted?
20. What was the attitude toward sex in your family? Was it talked about? Who taught you about sex?
21. How would you describe the current state of your health?
22. Have you ever had a serious illness? Have you ever had surgery?
23. Do you believe it is a sacred responsibility to take care of yourself?
24. Do you believe that taking care of your physical and mental health is a part of honoring your marriage vows?
25. Are there genetic diseases in your family or a history of cancer, heart disease, or chronic illness?
26. What do you need to feel energized and inspired in your home?
27. Is quiet important in your home, or do you prefer having music or some background noise most of the time?
28. Is it important to have a TV in the bedroom? Living room? Kitchen?
29. Do you like to sleep with the TV or radio on?
30. Is your attitude Love me, love my dog [cat; potbellied pig]?
31. Have you ever been physically aggressive with an animal? Have you deliberately hurt an animal?
32. Do you believe a person should give up his or her pet if it interferes with the relationship?
33. Do you have a best friend?
34. Do you see a close friend or friends at least once a week? Do you speak to any of your friends on the phone every day?
35. Are your friendships as important to you as your life partner is?
36. If your friends need you, are you there for them?
37. Is it important to you for your partner to accept and like your friends?
38. Are you an animal lover?
39. Do you have a dog, cat, or other beloved pet?
40. Have you ever felt deeply insecure in a relationship? Were you able to name your fear?
41. What would your reaction be if your partner were to gain a significant amount of weight?
42. How much money do you spend on clothing every year?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage for Yourself
We either respond positively or negatively to the events of life. It’s helpful to understand your own true intention before marriage by asking these questions to ask yourself before marriage. Try them out!
1. Are you really in touch with fashion? How much do you spend on clothes?
2. Do you have a good opinion about how you look? Are you worried your looks are going to fade with old age?
3. Did your parents use to shame you for your appearance, or were they always encouraging and complimented you? How about your peers?
4. Is there something in particular you dislike about yourself? Physical or otherwise.
5. Would you still love me if I suffered an accident and remained scarred? What about if I lost a limb?
6. If we’re together out in the town, should our outfits match?
7. Would you consider plastic surgery to “fix” something which you view as an imperfection?
8. Do you use make-up? How much? How often? How long does it take you to apply it? How much money do you spend on it?
9. Are you self-conscious about your weight?
10. Would you become angry or dissatisfied if I gained a noticeable amount of weight?
11. Do you both share similar values?
12. What is your partner’s relationship with money?
13. Do you see yourself growing old with this person?
14. Do you spend a lot of time in front of the mirror?
15. Is it important your partner also takes a lot of care of themselves?
16. Do you love and admire them as the person they are, not the person you want them to be?
17. Do you share the same expectations of the wedding?
18. Are you both comfortable with each other’s career prospects?
19. Have you and your partner discussed living arrangements after marriage?
20. Have you discussed whether or not you will have children?
21. Are you sure you’re not just infatuated?
22. How well do you know your partner?
23. Are you good friends as well as lovers?
24. How well do you communicate with your partner?
25. Do you have a lot of respect for your partner?
26. Is strong physical attraction a necessity for you to connect deeply with someone?
27. Do you wish to always be viewed as attractive?
28. Have you gotten a haircut in the past because someone commented passingly that your hair is messy?
29. How long does it take you to get over an insult?
30. Is food a reward to you? Do you expect a fancy dinner for an achievement, or spend remaining funds on grander cuisine?
31. Have you ever put on too much weight because of eating irregularly?
32. Did you ever try to control what a previous partner ate, so that they wouldn’t put on weight?
33. Have you ever got into fights with previous partners because a meal was too expensive?
34. Are there people whose opinions you really don’t value at all?
35. How much money are you willing to spend on takeout?
36. What are your favorite restaurants in our area?
37. Would we pay all takeaway orders from a shared account, or each one pays what he eats?
38. Is it a necessity that we eat together, or can we eats separately?
39. If you’re on a diet, should I only eat what you’re eating too?
40. Do you generally feel self-assured? Are you willing to have a go at things you’re not that skilled at (yet)?
41. Do you have a fine appreciation for food, or is it more like “fuel” for you to get through the day?
42. Do you make time to eat at a table, or are you always in a rush?
43. Are you a good cook? If not, do you expect me to cook, or are we looking at daily takeout?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage for Your Partner
By answering these pre-marriage questions, you can ensure that your relationship will be successful. Make sure you’re going to have a healthy relationship by using these questions to ask your partner before marriage.
1. Is it important for you to be involved in your local community?
2. Do you like having a close relationship with your neighbors? For example, would you give a neighbor a spare key to your home?
3. Do you regularly participate in community projects?
4. Do you believe that good fences make good neighbors?
5. Have you ever had a serious dispute with a neighbor?
6. Did you vote in the last presidential election? Congressional election? Local election?
7. Have you ever committed a crime? If yes, what was it?
8. Have you ever been arrested? If yes, for what?
9. Have you ever been in jail? If yes, why?
10. Have you ever been involved in a legal action or lawsuit? If yes, what were the circumstances?
11. Do you consider pets members of your family?
12. Have you ever been jealous of a partner’s relationship with a pet?
13. Have disagreements about pets ever been a factor for you in the breakup of a relationship?
14. Do you consider yourself liberal, moderate, or conservatives, or do you reject political labels??
15. Do you belong to a political party? Are you actively involved?
16. Do you take pains to be considerate of your neighbors (for example, keeping a lid on loud music, barking dogs, etc.)?
17. How important is it to you to contribute time or money to charity?
18. Which kind of charities do you like to support? How much of your annual income do you donate to charity?
19. Do you feel that it is the responsibility of the haves of the world to help the have-nots?
20. Have attitudes about charitable contributions ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
21. Have you served in the military?
22. Have your parents or other relatives served in the military?
23. Would you want your children to serve in the military?
24. Do you personally identify more with a nonviolent approach, or with making change through military force and action?
25. Has military service or attitudes about military service ever been a factor for you in the breakup of a relationship?
26. Do you consider yourself a law-abiding person?
27. Do you believe that two people of differing political ideologies can have a successful marriage?
28. Do you believe that the political system is skewed against people of color, poor people, and the disenfranchised?
29. Which political issues do you care about? (For example, equality national security, privacy, the environment, the budget; women’s rights, gay rights, human rights, etc.).
30. Has politics ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
31. Have you ever been the victim of a violent crime? If yes, describe what happened.
32. Do you believe it’s important to be rigorously honest when you pay taxes?
33. Have you ever failed to pay child support? If so, why?
34. Have legal or criminal issues ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
35. What was the attitude in your family about political involvement and social action?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage for Your Fiancé
You may be considering getting engaged. You probably already have a good relationship with your future spouse, but have you discussed everything? Before getting married, use these questions to ask your fiancé before marriage.
1. Do you like to dance?
2. How important is it to you for your children to be raised in your religion?
3. Is spirituality a part of your daily life and practice?
4. Has religion or spiritual practice ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
5. What are you very proud of but never have an excuse to talk about?
6. Do you seek out media with diverse perspectives on the news?
7. Have media differences ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
8. Do you have a current religious affiliation? Is it a big part of your life?
9. What is your favorite style of music?
10. Do you currently practice a different religion from the one in which you were raised?
11. Do you believe in life after death?
12. Does your religion impose any behavioral restrictions (dietary, social, familial, sexual) that would affect your partner?
13. Do you consider yourself a religious person? A spiritual person?
14. Do you engage in spiritual practices outside of organized religion?
15. Does popular culture have an important impact on your life?
16. Do you spend time reading about, watching, or discussing actors, musicians, models, or other celebrities?
17. Do you attend concerts featuring your favorite musicians?
18. Do you enjoy going to museums or art shows?
19. When you were growing up, did your family belong to a church, synagogue, temple, or mosque?
20. Do you regularly go to the movies, or do you prefer to rent movies and watch them at home?
21. Where do you get your news (for example, TV news programs, radio, newspapers, newsmagazines, the Internet, friends)?
22. Do you believe what you read and see in the news, or do you question where information is coming from and what the true agenda is?
23. Do you like to watch TV for entertainment?
24. Have attitudes or behaviors around popular culture ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
25. How important is it to you for your partner to share your religious beliefs?
26. How did your parents punish you when you were a child?
27. What’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever cried about?
28. If you could bring one of your past pets back to life, which one would you choose?
29. What’s the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to you?
30. What does a perfect day look like to you?
31. What was the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?
32. What did you hate as child but appreciate now?
33. What’s the least important thing that’s very important to you?
34. What was your first-ever date like?
35. What advice would you give your younger self?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage for Your Boyfriend
You should face each other with some difficult questions at some time throughout your romance and engagement. Your partner’s answer and reaction will be highly illuminating and telling. Even if it makes you uncomfortable, make sure to ask these questions to ask your boyfriend before marriage because you need to be ready.
1. What do you think a couple should do to keep the love alive in a marriage?
2. How do you spend your weekends?
3. What is your idea of the best date?
4. How important are events like wedding anniversaries to you?
5. How would you like to spend special days?
6. What are you looking for in a girl?
7. What, according to you, is the best thing about marriage?
8. What, according to you, is the worst thing about marriage?
9. What are your career aspirations?
10. What would you like to be doing five years from now?
11. What is your idea of marriage?
12. What, according to you, is more important in a marriage, love or respect?
13. How, according to you, will our life change if we got married?
14. What would you do if we fell out of love?
15. What are your long term family plans?
16. Do you think we can have a happy married life?
17. Do you believe in love?
18. Is there anything you don’t trust about me?
19. What kind of parent do you want to be someday?
20. What excites you about marriage?
21. What kind of house do you want to live in?
22. Is there anything that I should know?
23. Do you have any fear of marriage?
24. What does a wedding mean to you?
25. Name one thing that you would want to change about our relationship?
26. How would you like to spend your time with your family?
27. Is there anything that you would despise your wife doing?
28. How would you take it when your wife gets a better promotion at work?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage for Couples
There are many topics to discuss with your partner, but you may learn a lot by asking her a few simple questions, such as what they feel about marriage and relationships. Let’s go through this list of few questions for couples before marriage.
1. Do you think that college graduates are smarter than people who didn’t attend college? Have disparities in education ever been a source of tension for you in a relationship, or ended a relationship?
2. How do you feel about private school education for children? Do you have a limit on how much you would be willing to invest in private school education?
3. Have education levels or priorities ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
4. Do you own or lease a car? Would you ever consider not having a car?
5. Are fuel efficiency and environmental protection factors when you choose a car?
6. How much money do you regularly spend on leisure activities?
7. Do you enjoy activities that might make your partner uncomfortable, such as hanging out in bars drinking, going to strip clubs, or gambling?
8. Have leisure time issues ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
9. Do you enjoy entertaining, or do you worry that you’ll do something wrong or people won’t have a good time?
10. Is it important for you to attend social events regularly, or does the prospect rarely appeal to you?
11. Do you look forward to at least one night out every week, or do you prefer to enjoy yourself at home?
12. Does your work involve attending social functions? If so, are these occasions a burden or a pleasure?
13. Do you expect your spouse to be present, or do you prefer that your spouse not be present?
14. Do you socialize primarily with people from work, or with people from the same ethnic/racial/religious/ socioeconomic background?
15. Do you socialize with a diverse mix of people?
16. Are you usually the life of the party,” or do you dislike being singled out for attention?
17. Have you or a partner ever had an argument caused by one or the other’s behavior at a social function?
18. Have differences about socializing ever been a factor for you in the breakup of a relationship?
19. How long is your daily commute? Is it by bus, train, car, or carpool?
20. Do you maintain a family tradition around certain holidays?
21. How important are birthday celebrations to you? Anniversaries?
22. Have differences about holidays/birthdays ever been a factor for you in the breakup of a relationship?
23. Do you enjoy traveling, or are you a homebody?
24. Are vacation getaways an important part of your yearly planning?
25. How much of your annual income do you designate for vacation and travel expenses?
26. Do you have favorite vacation destinations? Do you believe it’s wasteful to spend money on vacations to distant places?
27. Do you think it’s important to have a passport? To speak a foreign language?
28. Have disputes about travel and vacation ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
29. What is your level of formal education? Is your education a source of pride or shame?
30. Do you regularly sign up for courses that interest you, or enroll in advanced-learning programs that will help you in your career or profession?
31. What is your idea of a fun day?
32. Do you have a hobby that’s important to you?
33. Do you enjoy spectator sports?
34. Are certain seasons off-limits for other activities because of football, baseball, basketball, or other sports?
35. What activities do you enjoy that don’t involve your partner? How important is it to you that you and your partner enjoy the same leisure activities?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage for Your Spouse
You should ask your potential spouse personal questions to learn about each part of their lives and to build a common understanding. Check out this list of questions to ask your spouse before marriage to choose from.
1. Do you judge people who have a different waking and sleeping clock than you?
2. Are you a physically affectionate person?
3. What is your favorite season of the year?
4. When you disagree with your partner, do you tend to fight or withdraw?
5. What is your idea of a fair division of labor in your household?
6. Have race, ethnicity, and differences ever been a source of tension and stress for you in a relationship?
7. What were your family’s views of race, ethnicity, and difference?
8. Is it important to you that your partner shares your vision of race, ethnicity, and difference?
9. Have different ideas about race, ethnicity~ and difference ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
10. Do you love to cook? Do you love to eat? 232. When you were growing up, was it important that everybody be present for dinner?
11. Would you consider yourself a morning person or a night person?
12. Do you follow a specific diet regimen that limits your food choices? Do you expect others in your household to adhere to certain dietary restrictions?
13. In your family is food ever used as a bribe or a proof of love?
14. Has eating ever been a source of shame for you?
15. Have eating and food ever been a source of tension and stress in a relationship? Have they ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
16. Are there household responsibilities you believe to be the sole domain of a man or a woman? Why do you believe this?
17. Do you believe that marriages are stronger if a woman defers to her husband in most areas? Do you need to feel either in control or taken care of?
18. How important is equality in a marriage? Define what you mean by equality.
19. Do you believe that roles in your family should be filled by the person best equipped for the job, even if it is an unconventional arrangement?
20. How did your family view the roles of girls and boys, men and women? In your family; could anyone do any job as long as it got done well?
21. Have different ideas about gender roles ever been a source of tension for you in a relationship, or the cause of a breakup?
22. What did you learn about race and ethnic differences as a child?
23. Which of those beliefs from childhood do you still carry; and which have you shed?
24. Does your work environment look more like the United Nations, or like a mirror of yourself? How about your personal life?
25. How would you feel if your child dated someone of a different race or ethnicity? The same gender? How would you feel if he or she married this person?
26. Do you have an unlisted telephone number? If yes, why?
27. Do you consider yourself a communicator or a private person?
28. What are the circumstances under which you would not answer the telephone, cell phone, or BlackBerry?
29. Has modem communication ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
30. Do you like to eat most of your meals sitting at the table, or do you tend to eat on the run?
31. Do you consider yourself a good driver? Have you ever received a speeding ticket?
32. Have cars or driving ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
33. How much time do you spend on the phone every day?
34. Do you have a cell phone? A BlackBerry?
35. Do you belong to any Internet chat groups? Do you spend significant time each day writing c-mails?
36. Do you consider yourself an easygoing person, or are you most comfortable with a firm plan of action?
37. How much sleep do you need every night?
38. Do you like to be freshly showered and wearing clean clothes every day, even on weekends or vacations?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage about Finances
Before getting married, it’s necessary to discuss finances, debt, and money because discussing your financial expectations with your partner will give you a better idea of financial status of your future spouse. Check out this list of questions to ask about finances.
1. How well are you at spending money?
2. Do you like budgeting?
3. How good are you at dealing with financial problems?
4. What would you do if we have financial problems in the future?
5. Do you save your life after retirement?
6. Do you have any loans?
7. What is better, a luxurious life with too much debt or a simple life without any debt?
8. Do you save money?
9. Do you plan for your future, or you just spend everything that you earn in the present?
10. Would you like to share your money with your spouse or split the money into different accounts?
11. How are your savings and spending habits?
12. Do you have money set aside for retirement?
13. How do bills get paid?
14. Are both spouses equally responsible for financial decisions?
15. Would you ever borrow money from friends or family if necessary?
16. Do you use credit cards?
17. Do you think couples should have a conversation before making any major purchases?
18. Do you need to confirm with your spouse before booking a family vacation or getting a new car?
19. What amount constitutes a major purchase?
20. Are material possessions important to you?
21. Do you have debt?
22. How do you plan to handle any current or future debt?
23. Do you think married couples should share a bank account?
24. Do you plan to combine finances with your spouse?
25. Do you keep a budget? How would you plan to manage one as a couple?
26. Would you be seeking additional income sources if we had financial problems?
27. What would you do if a family member asks for a large sum of money?
28. Who will be taking care of the matters related to household finances
Questions to Ask Before Marriage about Family and Children
Include these questions to ask about family and children in the list of questions you will ask to your sweetie. When discussing your plans to have children, you should also consider how you will raise them.
1. Do you want children? When? How many? Are you unable to have children?
2. Would you feel unfulfilled if you were unable to have children?
3. Who is responsible for birth control? What would you do if there were an accidental pregnancy before you planned to have children?
4. What is your view of fertility treatments? Adoption? Would you adopt if you were unable to have a child naturally?
5. How did your parents settle conflicts when you were a child? Do people in your family carry long-term grudges?
6. How much influence do your parents still have over your decisions?
7. Have unresolved or ongoing family issues ever been a factor for you in the breakup of a relationship?
8. Do you believe that a good mother will want to breast-feed her baby? Do you believe a mother or father should stay at home with a child during the first six months of life? The first year? Longer?
9. Do you believe in spanking a child? What type of discipline do you believe in (time-out, standing in the corner, taking away privileges, etc.)?
10. Do you believe that children have rights? Do you feel that a child’s opinion should be considered when making family and life decisions, such as moving or changing schools?
11. How important is it to you that your children are raised near your extended family?
12. Have you ever given birth to a child or fathered a child who was put up for adoption?
13. What is your view of abortion? Should a husband have an equal say in whether his wife has an abortion? Have you ever had an abortion?
14. How important is it that you and your partner be on good terms with each other’s families?
15. Do you have a difficult time setting limits with family?
16. How would you handle it if you didn’t like your child’s friends?
17. In a blended family; should birth parents be in charge of making decisions for their own children?
18. Would you ever consider getting a vasectomy or having your tubes tied? Do you believe it’s your choice, or does your partner have a say?
19. Have differences concerning conception or child-raising ever been a factor for you in the breakup of a relationship?
20. Are you close to your family?
21. Are you or have you ever been alienated from your family?
22. Have you identified the childhood wound that may have sabotaged your relationships in the past the deeply imprinted fear that made you want to escape? How were you most hurt in your family; and who hurt you?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage about Goals and Dreams
Make sure you and your partner are at ease with both your individual and common goals before getting married. Check out these questions to ask about goals and dreams to learn what your partner thinks.
1. Would you rather be rich and miserable or poor and happy?
2. Where do you see yourself after 5 years?
3. What is your life goal?
4. Do you have a dream job? If yes, then what is it?
5. Do you believe that your goals are is right track?
6. Where do you see yourself five years down the line from now?
7. Are you happy with your present company?
8. Is there any plan to switch your job in the near future?
9. Do you consider your work a career or just a job?
10. Has your work ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
11. What is your retirement plan? What do you plan to do when you stop working?
12. Have you ever been fired?
13. Have you ever quit a job suddenly? Have you changed jobs a lot?
14. What are your long term goals?
15. Would you mind if I have to travel for my job?
16. How often do you travel for your job?
17. Does your work involve night shifts?
18. Would it be okay if I have night shifts or late meetings?
19. Are you working on your chosen field?
20. How many hours a week do you work?
21. What does your job entail? (For example, do you often travel for business, work at home, performs dangerous tasks?)
22. What is your dream job?
23. Have you ever been called a workaholic?
Questions to Ask Before Marriage about Dealing with Conflict
You ought to have some idea of how you resolve disputes as a pair by the time you get married. Before you get serious about marriage, these are the questions to ask about dealing with conflict you should ask a prospective spouse.
1. Would you give enough space to your partner?
2. How well do you handle disagreements?
3. What would you do if there are disagreements between your family and me? Whose side would you choose in such a situation?
4. Would you consider taking marriage counseling if we were having marital problems?
5. Do you have temperamental issues?
6. Would you rather discuss issues as they arise or wait until you have a few problems?
7. How would you communicate you aren’t satisfied sexually?
8. What is the best way to handle disagreements in a marriage?
9. How can I be better at communicating with you?
10. Do you believe that disagreements are a part of a relationship?
11. How do you tackle obstacles in your life? In a relationship?
12. Would you be willing to go to marriage counseling if we were having marital problems?
13. If there is a disagreement between me and your family, whose side do you choose?
14. How do you handle disagreements?
15. Would you ever consider divorce?
16. Would you ever go for a divorce?
17. What do you do when there are immense disagreements?
18. Do you like discussing things when there are issues or just suppressing your emotions until they get bigger?
19. What, according to you, is the best way to handle disagreements in a relationship
5 Tips for Choosing Questions to Ask Before Marriage
Some couples view marriage as the start of a journey where they will get to know and love one another more deeply every day. Others would rather have a clearer picture of the course they are about to take. Couples should spend some time talking about certain fundamental challenges that almost all married couples will face in order to achieve that goal. Here are 5 tips for choosing questions you should ask before marriage:
1. Choose questions before marriage for a meaningful and engaging debate from the categories above, the internet, books, or your own thoughts. They will serve as a building block of your mutual understanding and knowing each other priorities.
2. Choose serious questions to ask before getting married because they merit intelligent answers that might not come right away. Set aside some time to have these discussions before to marriage if you and your lover are considering marriage seriously so that you can be certain of what you both feel and think. This will offer you plenty of opportunities to choose whether marriage should be the next stage in your relationship, even if you have 101 questions to ask before becoming engaged.
3. Identifying any potential negative questions for both of you at the beginning of the question session can help you avoid unpleasant talks. You should also give yourselves permission to skip through any topics or parts of the story you find objectionable. Don’t choose to ask the teasing questions that might irritate your partner and adversely affect your relationship.
4. Ask each question separately. Start off by asking a broad question that is simple for your partner to respond to. Simple questions like “What do you enjoy in the drinks?” or “what color is your favorite?” Based on the direction the conversation is taking, choose the next question. Move up in a completely new direction if a question falls flat or creates too much of a stir. Alternately, if the conversation is constructive and lively, ask more pertinent questions.
5. Don’t disregard your partner’s answer if it caused you to become upset, triggered, or uneasy. Lean in and consider why you felt that way in response to their reply first. Then bring it up again later and clarify with further questions.
Final Thoughts on Questions to Ask before Marriage
The big step in a relationship is getting married. It represents your dedication to and affection for the person you wish to share your life with. But sometimes love isn’t enough.
Before getting married, there are several topics to discuss that go beyond love, such as having children, handling conflicts, holding onto one’s beliefs, finances, and extended family.
You might think that you and your significant other know everything about one another by the time you two have become serious enough to sign a certificate. Even yet, there are still a lot of things that couples should discuss before getting married but frequently wait to do so until after the ceremony.
You’ll probably discover desires, goals, and expectations for your future together if you ask the appropriate questions to ask before marriage.
Even if your preferences and ambitions will change over time, asking these questions to ask before marriage now could prevent some future arguments. Or, at the very least, the questions to ask before getting married will equip you to tackle them successfully.
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